A Long Day
by seishu-kun
Summary: When there's nothing much to do, Soul Society is occupied with parties and gossips. What would happen if one night of drinking and talking with friends would start an avalanche of new thoughts? ByaxRuki fanfic, rated M for future
1. Drunk conversations

**ok so guys, this is my first fanfic ever so be gentle with me. I went through all ByaxRuki fanfics and this idea occured to me so I decided to give it a try. I promise, I'll do my best. I would be happy of course if you give me any tips of advices ;) Also, i should mention that I'm a guy and this is suppose to be a romance so please, be tolerant ;)))))**

**And of course, I do not own Bleach nor the characters. But I will, one day...**

* * *

"it was a long day" she thought. A long and a boring day. Indeed, nothing interesting happened. Like yesterday and the day before. Since Aizen was defeated and finally peace came to Soul Society nothing out of the ordinary happened. Sometimes a simple fight with hollow, some drinks with friends and always a load of paperwork seemed to be everyday life now. As Rukia entered her shower her thoughts begun to drift elsewhere. _Was it going to be always like that?_ Just everyday duties, hanging out with others and then again duties? Some strange feeling occurred. She couldn't say what was it and for that time she left it undescribed. But indeed, something seemed different, maybe wrong? Or maybe she was lacking something? Either way, she couldn't tell. She shook her head as her thoughts begun to be more disturbing and washed herself quickly. She was going to another drinking party with Matsumoto and others so she couldn't be disturbed by some irrelevant thoughts now.

* * *

"AAAA… Rukia-chan! Glad you made it!" Matsumoto yelled from the start. Tipsy as always - she waved her hand, instructing Rukia to sit over.

Renji, Hisagi, Kira, Momo, Ikkaku and Yumichika were all there already. Rukia took her sit between girls and begun to drink sake.

"We were just talking about how boring is this place" Matsumoto said.

"Oh? I was thinking about it just before I got here!" Rukia answered.

"Yeah, and what's worse, paperwork seems to never end" Renji said and sighed. "Your brother is really unbearable with this."

"It's only because you really suck at paperwork Renji and it's not going to change in any time." Rukia said and laughed.

They all begun to laugh about Renji and his paperwork skills. Evening was pleasant and relaxing and after some time all of the party guests were a little bit drunk. Maybe except Matsumoto who was always drunk as fuck.

"Rukiaaaaaaa… we should get you a guy!" Matsumoto babbled.

"A what?!" Rukia asked a little bit shocked.

"You know… A guy! A man… What was it… A BOYFRIEND!"

"But why me? You seem to be enjoying this kind of stuff."

"Oh come on Rukia. Don't be such a windbag. We all… pfff… you know, have somebody, look!"

Rukia stared at her friends that were now very interested what Matsumoto was about to say.

"Look, Momo has my captain, as always…"

"Rangiku! I certainly do not hang out with Shiro-chan! He is my friend!" Momo protested but everyone begun to laugh at this statement.

"Keep telling that" Matsumoto just answered and started again. "Well… What was I sayin'? Ah, right. So Momo's with my captain, Hisagi is seeing some blond chick from… from…" she looked at Hisagi but he was already totally drunk and didn't really paid attention to what was Matsumoto saying.

"from nevermind! Kira is also seeing someone and guys… Oh Yumichika has Ikkaku!" she rumbled giving them both a wink.

"What is that mad woman sayin?!" Ikkaku yelled.

"Let her be. She's in her drunken world" Yumichika answered with a flirt in his voice.

"And I… I don't mind hanging out with Renji" Matsumoto winked at Renji who immediately turned red. "Hope you don't mind, Rukia."

"Oh, I don't mind. We were always friends. If he's happy then I'm happy too." Rukia gave a warm smile to Renji. "So-"

"Yessss… back to you, Rukia, right. And you, my dear friend, you don't hang out! And you don't make out! And you don't do all the other fantastic things you should!"

"But I… I just… You know, it's not-"

"Shhhh… No but's! You don't and it's a fact. And you definitely should. With some hot guy. Or you prefer girls maybe?" Matsumoto winked at her.

"I prefer guys of course!" Rukia yelled at her drunk friend. "But who should I date then if you're so eager with advices?"

"Now that's a problem! I thought you would do something with Ichigo, 'cos you were spending so much time with him."

"Ichigo? Are you mad or something? He is my friend and a human. Way too young for me." Rukia answered as the thought of her hanging out with Ichigo was so stupid.

"Hmm… who then? Iba's good guy, but I got to admit, he's got something with dogs and it's a little bit disturbing… you know, not that I don't like dogs or something, but… he should pay more attention to the girls. And those sunglasses… What was I sayin?"

"that Iba is not good." Rukia replied a little bit tired with the conversation which was too much focused on her and her private life.

"Uuuuu… I know! That's a good one. I'm sometimes so clever I can't help it, you know…."

"Yyyy…?"

"Matsumoto, you didn't tell anyone's name for heaven's sake." Yumichika said. "Surprise us!"

"Oh yes, but you gotta love this one. He is really handsome, hot I would definitely date him. Maybe then I should, really?" Matsumoto rumbled a bit to herself and was lost in her thoughts again.

"Name please, oh God!" Yumichika urged her.

"Rukia, you should date Kuchiki-taichou!"

"WHAT?!" Rukia spitted out her sake. "You are really mad! He's my brother, idiot!"

"But you're not blood related. Totally strangers except of course the family name but who would care?"

"I definitely would! Besides, Nii-sama is just…" Rukia couldn't find the right word to describe her brother.

"Cold?" Yumichika replied.

"Boring?" Ikkaku added.

"Emotionless!" Momo blurted.

"A really stiffed pain in the ass!" Renji summed up. "My Taichou is like a figure only full of paperwork and other boring stuff. Have you actually met him Matsumoto?!"

"But he's a real candy!" Matsumoto replied. "And I think Rukia would get along with him! And they would make such a lovely couple!"

"But he's my Nii-sama! I respect him and admire him. And I love him like a brother!" Rukia said angrily. "And don't say that stuff about him Renji, he's very kind and protective."

"Blah, blah, blah… here we go again." Renji waved his hand.

"Rukia, seriously, there's nothing wrong with you and him. You would have such a lovely babies!" Matsumoto said with excitement. "Though I have to admit… I cannot seem to imagine him making those babies…"

"MATSUMOTO!"

* * *

After the party was over, Rukia, a little bit drunk and tired, was heading the Kuchiki manor. As she entered she had a browse around to find out everyone was already asleep. _It's 2 in the morning. Who am I supposed to find here?_ She was slowly going to her room when suddenly she bashed into something hard. Or to be more precise, _someone_.

"Uhm… oh! Nii-sama! I didn't think you would be awake!" Rukia said shocked. "I'm so sorry!"

He didn't said anything. He didn't even looked at her but it was obvious he was waiting for something.

"I'm sorry Nii-sama. I should go to my room now and have some sleep now."

"You should know by now that your work is much more effective if you are not tired the entire day." He finally said, still not looking at her with emotionless face as always.

"Yes, I know that Nii-sama. I am so deeply sorry. I should be going." Rukia face was full of embarrassment and fear.

Byakuya only nodded still not giving a single look at her and walked away towards his bedroom. Rukia sighed heavily and also went to her room. She was stressed out as always when she thought she did something wrong or act stupid. She couldn't however tell what was he thinking about it at all, because his face never showed any signs of emotion and he was rarely looking at her, though his eyes wouldn't tell anything as well.

* * *

Rukia quickly changed her daily clothes to night robe and got into bed. She closed her eyes and tried to get asleep as fast as she could. But after a long day and some sake her senses weaken, but yet another heightens. She was half way asleep when an image of her brother appeared next to her. He was very close to her but still very distant. He was saying something to her, but she couldn't hear what was it. He caressed her hand and smiled at her. And she felt shiver at first, but then warmth of his soft skin begun to flow through her body. What happened afterwards she couldn't tell and the dream of her brother begun to slowly fade away. _Nii-sama…_ she whispered, but no voice came out. He disappeared in her dream but the warmth on her hand was still there. Finally, she got asleep and nothing disturbed her thoughts. _Was he ever there?_ This question crossed her mind for a second in her dream. _Was he?_

* * *

**Ok guys, so here it is. My first chapter ever. Not too long, not too short either. I guess. Come to think of it, I did nice work here, hehe ;) Anyway, I would be madly happy for reviews so go for it! Also, if you don't like it, do tell me as well but in a polite way as I am a total beginner ;)**

**yours truly, saihitei**


	2. Apologizes

**ok, so here it is. chapter 2. thanks for the tip about the conversation marks, i changed it. this chapter is a little bit longer, beacause i want to get to the interesting points and not to bore you. i hope you like it!**

* * *

Morning came faster than Rukia expected. She yawned loudly and went to the shower to prepare herself for the upcoming day. Freshened up and dressed Rukia made for the breakfast. She was indeed very tired, just like her brother predicted. She entered the dining room, keeping herself from another yawn and she sat next to him.

"Good morning Nii-sama" she greeted him with a subtle smile.

He simply nodded at her as he used to. They ate their breakfast in a complete silence. Rukia glanced at her brother from time to time only to find out that he didn't really pay attention to her presence. Rukia casted back her mind to her first breakfast with him. She was stressed but also very annoyed that he wasn't talking to her at all. That silence that they shared was almost killing her as there were so many questions she wanted to ask him. Those questions never really disappeared from her, but after some time she understood that there won't be any answers and she even begun to appreciate those quiet meals.

After a while though she decided to speak.

"Nii-sama, once again, I am deeply sorry about what happened last night."

"You mean today's morning." He finally spoke however still not looking at her.

"Y-yes… I am very sorry." She apologized once again and felt a little bit embarrassed.

"Rukia." He suddenly straightened and looked at her with expressionless face. "There is no need for you to apologize more than it is necessary. I accepted your apologize this early morning and the issue was settled."

"Y-yes, Nii-sama." She lowered her eyes.

"You should get ready for your duties." He stated and looked away.

"Yes Nii-sama, I'm going." She replied and tried to look at him again. "May I leave then?"

Again, he just nodded with dismissal. Rukia left the dining room stress out. _If only once in a lifetime I could have one decent conversation with him_. She sighed and took her way to 13th Division Headquarters.

* * *

Her day was passing slowly, mainly filled with paperwork and training. The weather was nice and Rukia thought that it was a good day to have a lunch outside. Maybe she would run into Renji or Matsumoto? She thought about two of them and smiled. She knew Renji for a long time and despite his blunt behavior she knew that he was shy inside. Especially towards girls. So she was very happy for him, when he eventually admitted that he was seeing someone. Rukia wished him all the best and she knew that Matsumoto would surely take good care of him. _I'm not that sure though aren't they just going to descent into alcoholism…_

"Kuchiki-san!" a familiar voice suddenly rang out. "Before you go for your lunch, please take those papers to 6th Division Taichou".

Ukitake Juushirou, 13th Division Captain smiled gently to Rukia, handing her a pile of files.

"I presumed that you're going there anyway to Lieutenant Abarai." white-haired man added.

"Well, yes of course, I'll take it with me." Rukia nodded and returned the smile.

"Then take your time, with the lunch. It's so beautiful outside it would be a shame not to use it." He waved to Rukia with even bigger smile. When she left the room quickly, he coughed hardly. "My, my… these kids. Always in such a hurry."

* * *

When Rukia finally reached 6th Division barracks, she went straight to the Captain's office. To her surprise, there was only Renji scrawling something down.

"Oh, Rukia! You little midget. How is making babies going?" Renji greeted Rukia with a laugh.

"Shut up, idiot!" she punched him hardly.

"Come on it's so ridiculous that I couldn't stop laughing. Rangiku outdid herself this time for real".

"Oooooh… Rangiku?" Rukia asked obstreperously.

"Now you should just shut up!" Renji blushed. "Why are you here anyway?"

"Well, I came to leave Nii-sama these files and I thought you'd join me for lunch." Rukia took a look around the office and stopped at her brother desk, which was empty. "And where is Nii-sama?"

"Oh, he left some time ago leaving me these piles of paper. And I have no idea where he went, but you can leave him these files."

"He didn't say where he was going?"

"Well, no. It's not like he's confiding in me or something." Renji said virulently. "Come on, let's go for that lunch!"

Renji grabbed his stuff and left with Rukia. They sat under a big tree and sometime after, Matsumoto joined them as well. They were eating and laughing and all seemed to be carefree. As soon as Renji grabbed Matsumoto in his embrace, Rukia looked away and started daydreaming. _They seem to really get along with each other._ She begun to think if there ever were anyone special in her life. Friend over here, a crush over there, nothing serious all her life. She remembered her biggest _love_, Shiba Kaien. Of course, she didn't let herself fall in love with him as he was married, but even his presence seemed to brighten up her days. After his death, she couldn't handle it at first. Sleepless nights and nightmares. But days flew by and after many years from his death, she learnt to live with his absence.

But then again, there was no one in her life, except friends. And there was _her_ Nii-sama. They seemed to develop a special kind of connection. After all, their relation was out of the ordinary. When she was adopted, she felt grateful but also very rebellious. Rukia couldn't comply with all the rules and his lack of any emotions, but after many years, she begun to read between lines. What she thought at first was coldness and harshness, was really kindness and protection. She knew he wouldn't ever want to show her any of this emotions openly, but at some point in her life, it was just obvious that he cared.

When he rescued Rukia from Ichimaru Gin's _Shinso_ or when he killed that Arrancar in Hueco Mundo. He didn't say a word about any of those situations, showing no affection at all, but Rukia knew. She knew he cared, she knew that she can always rely on him. Of course, she didn't want to overuse any of this. But the thought that he's somewhere there, made a warm felling in her heart. And she wasn't afraid anymore. Moreover, she begun to love him, in her own way.

* * *

"Hey Rukia-chan! Daydreaming about your new boyfriend?" Matsumoto asked loudly.

"What? No! I'm not thinking about Nii-sama and he's not my boyfriend!" Rukia answered quickly.

"Here, see Renji? I didn't even mention Kuchiki-taichou but he was the first man on her mind!" Matsumoto laughed heavily.

"Yeah, midget. I see you're thinking of him!" Renji added laughing as well.

"Stop it, I'm not thinking about Nii-sama that way, pervert!"

"Well, you could date him, ya know? Maybe if he would be occupied hanging out with you, he wouldn't have time for giving me those loads of paperwork!"

"And here I thought you were thinking about my happiness…" Rukia said, pretending to be sad.

"Of course I am thinking about your happiness. Imagine your happiness when making those babies!" Renji laughed hard at her and so did Matsumoto.

"I'm telling you again. I am not making any babies with Nii-sama!"

"I haven't noticed it either." A deep, cold voice spoke.

Rukia stiffened at those words and begun to slowly turn her head.

"N-Nii-sama…" she tried to rumble something.

"Abarai, I see that you're done with paperwork from the morning if you have time to fool around. In that case, I provided you with some more and it's already waiting for you in the office."

"Y-yes, of course Taichou. On my way!" Renji nodded and quickly shunpoed to his office.

Rukia wanted to tell something, but her brother seemed to lost his interests in that very moment and also shunpoed in unknown direction.

"Geez, that guy is incredible. I haven't see him coming." Matsumoto sighed with a relief in her voice.

"Of course you didn't. He almost always masks his reiatsu. And of course he came to hear me making an idiot of myself!"

"Oh honey, give it a break. He didn't seem to be mad or something."

"He never does any of it. But I bet he's thinking that I'm a disgrace to the family and also a complete moron." Rukia sighed and gave herself a heavy facepalm.

"Girl, go easy with yourself. It was only a joke." Matsumoto winked.

* * *

Rukia and Matsumoto parted a while after, each of them in an opposite direction. Rukia got to her Division quickly just to occupy her mind with work after that embarrassing incident. She was sure she would have to apologize him for the second time this day. _He always comes in the worst moment to see me making a fool of myself_. If only he could see her in a better moments and for once be proud of her, instead of ashamed. She thought he has to be extra patient if after all this time he didn't even yelled at her once or even kicked her out of the family for this outrageous behavior.

The rest of the day passed quickly and it was finally time for Rukia to come back home. Heavy-hearted, she entered the manor looking for her brother, but he was again nowhere to be found. She went to her room and changed from her Shihakushou to a beautiful purple kimono that her brother once gave her. She wanted to please him more as the upcoming conversation would be rather strange and embarrassing. When the bell rang, announcing the dinner time, Rukia quickly left her room and went for a dinner.

To her surprise, her brother was absent. The servants handed her the first meal and she asked whether her brother will be joining, but the maid told her that he sent them an information, that he'll be home rather late. Rukia felt relief at first, but then a bit disappointed. She enjoyed dinners with her brother, however strange they would have seem. She just enjoyed his silent company and was always looking forward for it. And she was more than overjoyed when some conversation occurred, even the smallest one. Rukia always felt a little bit concerned of her brother, because despite his cold behavior, she thought he could just felt lonely. And after all he did for her, she felt responsibility to minimalize this loneliness as much as she could.

When the night appeared, Rukia was sitting in her bed, reading book. She wanted to wait for her brother to come home, but it was getting late and he was still not home. When she wanted to finally gave up waiting, a sudden noise pealed. She quietly got up to check what was it only to find out her brother walking around the garden. She sighed gathering her strengths and walked outside her room. Slowly and quietly she walked towards him, feeling the incredible need to apologize.

When she finally was near enough to speak, she sighed again and begun to talk.

"Would it be very troubling if I join you, Nii-sama?" she asked timidly.

He didn't answer, only nodded with his approval. She made another few steps towards him and looked at the same direction as he did for a short time. Then she tried again.

"I want to apologize you Nii-sama, for what you've heard today." She did her best not to blush.

"You shouldn't apologize, Rukia. I, from many people, know the best that this ridiculous idea came from someone else."

"Yes… But I was participating that conversation so I felt I have to tell you how sorry I am."

"There is no need for that. It seems that Abarai is not that occupied with his duties if he have so much time to create such nonsenses."

"But don't be mad at him, Nii-sama. It was only a joke. Renji didn't mean anything bad."

"Do you think I would punish him for such a trifle?"

"No, of course not. I just didn't want for you to be mad."

"there aren't many occasions for me to be mad, but if there are, they are much more reasonable than this."

"T-thank you, Nii-sama."

He nodded again, and sat on the bench, under his beloved sakura tree. Rukia wasn't sure if she could sit too, but she wanted to spend more time with him, so she placed herself on the other side of the bench. The night was getting cold, but she didn't want to leave her brother. They were sitting in a complete silence, looking at the beautiful garden. After a while, Rukia shivered from the cold and to her surprise, he noticed it.

"You should go to bed now, it's getting cold."

"But I wanted to sit here with you, Nii-sama, for a bit longer." She blurted and then realized that maybe he was just sending her away. "But if of course you want to sit alone-"

"It's fine with me." He interrupted her and took of his haori and placed it on her shoulders.

She immediately felt wormer and thanked him. His haori smelled of cherry blossoms and she begun to wonder if this is his scent. From all of the fragrances, she thought that it has to be his. Sweet, cherry blossoms. Rukia felt warm and the sweet smell of her brother and didn't even noticed when she was falling asleep.

After a while, he noticed that she was breathing much loudly and looked at her only to find out she was asleep. He wasn't sure whether he should wake her up or not. After a moment, he decided to slowly take her in his arms and carry her to her bed. Still wrapped up in his haori, she was rumbling something under her nose, but he couldn't hear what was it. For a second, he smiled and thought that she looks very peaceful while asleep. He carried her to her room, and laid her on the bed. He wanted to take his haori back, but she was keeping it tight with her little hands. He abandoned this idea and covered her with a blanket. He gave her one last look and left her room, leaving her sleeping.

* * *

She had a strange dream, of cherry blossoms. She could almost feel the smell on her face. It was warm and sweet and she felt a sudden happiness. There was someone in her dream, but she couldn't see his face, only she knew it belonged to a man. She wanted to get near him, but he was fading away. In the last moment, she could swear it was her brother. She wanted to catch him, but he already disappeared. Rukia called out for him, but he wasn't there anymore. Suddenly, she felt very sad. But she couldn't tell why.

* * *

**ok guys, so here was chapter 2. i'll do my best to update as fast as i can. i will be more than happy for the new reviews, as it is my first fic, i want to know should i write more or just lock myself in a basement and prey for forgivness.**

**thanks again ;))**


	3. A Celebration Party

**ok, so here's chapter 3. i think they are getting longer and longer. i would like to thank all of you that read and reviewed for it made me update so soon. i must admit, every review made me feel like and 6 year-old in front of a christmass tree. and for that, thank you all. i hope you'll like this new chapter.**

* * *

It was a beautiful morning as the sun was shining and Rukia felt breeze on her cheeks. She slowly opened her eyes and yawned. She took a quick look at her alarm clock and sighed with a relief as it was still early enough. She wanted to stretch her body, but to her surprise there was something that held her tight. She lowered her gaze and her eyes widen in shock. It was her brother's haori! _What on earth is this haori doing here?!_ She desperately tried to remember last night. Nii-sama, garden, feeling cold… _of course, Nii-sama gave it to me in the garden! But… what am I doing here with it?_ She focused harder only to find out that she must have got to fall asleep. But how did she got here? Did Nii-sama bring her in?

_Oh no! His haori is so messed up. I have to do something!_ Rukia startled at the vision of handing back haori to Nii-sama in this condition. She picked it up quickly a rushed from her room. She looked around, searching for at least one servant who could help her. To her relief, Nanami, one of the servants was passing through.

"Nanami, thank God. I need your help!" Rukia approached. "I need you to clean and iron this haori for me as fast as you can."

"It will be ready in 20 minutes, Rukia-sama." Nanami bowed and quickly went away.

Rukia sighed with a relief. She went back to her room to prepare herself for the day. She showered and then changed into her Shihakushou. When she was tying her obi, servant came back with the haori.

_Now, that looks so much better._ she smiled at herself and got a quick look at the clock. As it was time for the breakfast, she grabbed the haori quickly and ran towards the dining room.

Rukia slowly entered the dining and she noticed that her brother was already there, waiting for her. She bowed and sat next to him. Then she put his haori on the table.

"Thank you Nii-sama. I assume you brought me to my room?" she asked with a sound of appreciation in her voice.

He just nodded, and begun to eat. Rukia smiled at him and started eating too. This was again, something she really enjoyed to do. She was reveling in silence when suddenly a Hell Butterfly flew through the window. It stopped in front of Byakuya's face for a moment then it flew away. However no expression came from Byakuya's face as he continued to eat in silence. Rukia on the other hand was pretty curious what information did the Hell Butterfly passed onto her brother. Not that it was any of her business of course, but before she thought that way, words begun to flow.

"Nii-sama, did something happen?"

Byakuya rose his head from his plate and for the first time this morning, he really gave Rukia a look, directly in the eyes. Though his face showed no signs of any affection, the girl was startled. _Why is he looking at me, all of the sudden?_ She didn't however got a chance to think it over, as he spoke.

"Rukia," his deep voice redoubled. "I have a Captain's meeting in an hour, _if you have to know_."

"Oh, I'm sorry Nii-sama, I was only cur-"

"I can see that."

Rukia, as it could be expected begun to apologize. But the truth was, Byakuya felt amused with her behavior. It seemed that she has a habit of apologizing to him, whenever she thought she have displeased him. Though his face was still expressionless, deep down he was smiling. _Is she really that afraid of me, after all this time?_ Byakuya couldn't just understand why was he still scaring her away, making her apologize practically for every action. There was only one situation, that could make him mad. And it wasn't talking blunt in front of him nor even making jokes. He was really pissed when she put herself in danger and was so willingly sacrificing her health or live for Kurosaki Ichigo and his friends. It's not that it wasn't honorable of her, to protect people she cared about. It was that she was running towards the evil with no plan and almost every time her attempts failed and she ended up injured. He managed to save her couple times, but he couldn't be there always.

_Doesn't she know every time she acts like this – it breaks my heart?_

* * *

Captain's meeting started as planned. All the Captains were very curious about its purpose. The peace came to Soul Society months ago and nothing pointed to change. Hollows appeared randomly but it was rather rarely. So what was the meaning of it all? Byakuya didn't even bother himself to think about it. For him, those meetings were almost always meaningless. Especially now, when nothing important haven't occurred for a long time it was always something about training new recruits, some new rules or delegating someone's vice-captain to the living world. So he assumed now it would be the same. He couldn't have known, how wrong was he.

"You all must wonder about the purpose of this meeting." Captain General finally spoke and everyone turned their looks towards him.

"So let's get to the point. We are having this meeting because of an upcoming celebration over defeating Aizen and the peace for Soul Society that came within."

A celebration? That statement caused a commotion among the Captains.

"Silence!" In a second the room was quiet again. "The idea of this celebration came from 5th Division Captain, Hirako Shinji. Therefore, he will be the person who will provide you with all the details and who will be responsible for its success."

"A celebration? I'm not going to be a part of this." Byakuya spoke coldly.

"You will be, Kuchiki-Taichou. You all will be. Presence at the celebration party is obligatory. This is an order."

Byakuya was irritated. Since when did the parties become duties? He could understand Renji would came with such an idea but he always thought that Captain General was way above it. What a disappointment. However there was nothing he could did about it so he was listening in silence what was said after.

Hirako Shinji, the Captain of the 5th Squad took few steps forward to look at all of the Captains and spoke with a smile on his face.

"Yo people, listen." He begun to speak and his smile gone wider.

"This is what we're goin' to do. We will have a huge party in week from today. Everyone's invited and because we will celebrate the peace in Soul Society, an idea popped in my head."

At this late statement, his eyes grew wider and he rubbed his hands. Before however he got a chance to explain the party specifications, Soi Fon, Captain of the 2nd Squad cut in.

"Everyone… like every Shinigami or…" she spoke sharply, yet some shyness seemed to affect her words.

"Way beyond that, lady!" Hirako replied with an excitement. When I say everyone, I mean every Shinigami and our honor guests. There will be Kurosaki Ichigo of course and his gang from the living world." He stopped for a second to see disappointment on Soi Fon's face.

"But I requested Captain General to grant an one-time permission for two people to come along also!" He smiled and blinked at Soi Fon.

"Yes. Shihoin Yoruichi and Urahara Kisuke are also welcome to come. For this once." Captain General explained and nodded at Hirako to speak again.

"And people, there are few things that are required for this party to be outstanding and unforgettable! And the first thing for you is to have fun! A lot of fun. Like tones of fun!" He almost burst with excitement.

"And there are three things for every Captain to prepare to the party. First one is to choose a song from the living world that best describes you and your Squad."

Expressions on the faces were different with almost every Captain. Ukitake and Kyoraku were enjoying the idea of throwing a party, Soi Fon was excited that Yoruichi is coming, Kenpachi said that if Ichigo would be there that it's all he's interested in. Kurotsuchi said that although he didn't care about the party, he would attend and provide some electro music. Unohana concluded that having such a big party could provide some problems and first of all she has to double her supplies of aspirin. Komamura was apathetic and the rest of Visard Captains were excited as well.

As for Byakuya, he thought the whole idea is ridiculous and that if it is really an order then he would participate but surely he would not enjoy it.

"The second thing is for your vice-captains. They have to do a short skit about you, pretending to be you!"

That was surely the most stupid thing Byakuya has ever heard. Renji pretending to be him? And it supposed to be funny? If the celebration purpose was to humiliate him then it was accomplished.

"And the last, but not the least! At the party, every each of you must dance at least once. You can choose freely your partner of course, but you'll have to dance. And I will be watching very closely people! So watch out!" Hirako ended his statement and clapped his hands.

"And now that you are all familiar with the details you have one week to prepare." Captain General spoke calmly.

"You are dismissed!"

* * *

Byakuya was sitting in his office, thinking about these revelations. Of course, when he told Renji about the party, the last one was more than excited. He almost immediately assured his Captain that he would handle all the preparations and that the 6th Squad would be the best one. Byakuya was heavily doubting. Maybe if Rukia was his Vice-Captain, things would be different, but Renji would certainly humiliate him more than once.

"Taichou… I was thinking about the song. Ichigo once gave me a CD with some hardcore hip-hop and I was thinking…" Renji tried to persuade Byakuya with his ideas.

"No." Byakuya cut in sharply. "I will choose the proper song for our Division."

"B-but Taichou…" Renji tried really hard. "If-"

"I am not going to repeat myself Abarai."

"Y-yes Taichou." Renji was sad and disappointed. He thought that this hip-hop from Ichigo would really suit their Squad. But after a few moments, another idea popped out of the red-headed Vice-Captain.

"Um, Taichou. Since I'm going to pretend to be you, maybe you could lend me your kenseikans since you don't wear them now."

"Out of the question."

"Then um, scarf maybe?"

"Not a chance."

"How about-"

"No. To all your questions."

Renji sighed sadly and was doing his best to think about his little skit. He has to definitely ask Rukia to persuade his Captain to lend him his hairpieces. And to let him choose the song, because he wasn't sure that his Captain's choice wouldn't make them a boring and stiff Squad. Yes, Rukia would definitely help him with it, or else Ichigo would roast him heavily.

* * *

"Yo, Rukia!" Renji yelled as he saw his little friend on his way. "Come here, midget!"

"What do you want, idiot?" Rukia asked with some suspicion.

"Did you heard about the upcoming party?"

"Of course I did. Ukitake-Taichou gave us all the details about it."

"So who's gonna pick a song in your Squad?"

"Our Taichou, of course. He's got such a great taste in music. Why you're asking?"

"B-because… My Taichou decided he'll pick the song as well."

"Nii-sama is choosing a song for the party?" she asked with disbelief in her voice. "Really?"

"Yes, that is my point. _He_ is choosing the song. So what it's gonna be? Orchestral music or something far more stiffer. I cannot let him do that!"

"Nii-sama is picking the song… well, he surely ain't gonna choose your hip-hop or something common."

"Yes, I know. And he'll embarrass me on front of the guys! You gotta do something!"

"Like what?!" Rukia asked surprised. It wasn't like she would just go talk to him and he would suddenly change his mind. "If he decided to pick the song, you can do nothing about it."

"Yeah, my point exactly. I can't. But you do."

"Me?! You're crazy or what?"

"Please, Rukia, don't let him pick the song, for his and mine own good. Convince him somehow!"

* * *

Yes, convince him somehow. Like it would help. She knew that although she seemed to be the closest person to Byakuya, he was still too distant for her to just approach him and tell him to change his mind. That Renji, why did he ask her to do it? _Nii-sama is never going to change his mind._

As Rukia was thinking about the most suitable way to convince her brother to change his mind she finally arrived Kuchiki manor. She wasn't sure whether wait until the dinner or not. Or maybe ask him when he would be visiting his garden. Whatever time she would choose, she was sure that her mission would fail and that thought made her even more angry with Renji that she already was. And as she was just ready to give up the whole idea, she heard something coming from the study room.

Rukia wasn't sure at first, but with every step the noise became much clearer and suddenly she knew what was it. Nii-sama was really listening to the music. And as Renji thought, it was classical music. So, Nii-sama wanted it to be noble and classy. No way she would convince him otherwise!

She, however, approached the study room and was willing to give it a try. Not that she was so concern with Renji reputation, as it was already shattered. But she didn't want people to think of her Nii-sama as a stiff person. Because she was sure that deep down, he was just gentle and kind.

Rukia knocked at the door and not waiting for the answer, she stepped in. Byakuya was sitting in front of something what had similar shape to the computer Ichigo was using in the world of living. She knew that Kurotsuchi Mayuri was asked to hand over one to each Captain to help them with their work with party arrangements. Byakuya was as usual expressionless, however Rukia managed to catch the difference in his eyes, as they seemed to soften somehow. _So, is Nii-sama enjoying music?_

"Rukia." Deep voice got her out of her thoughts.

"Nii-sama." She managed to answer quickly. "Is Nii-sama choosing the song for the party?"

Byakuya nodded, then he turned his head to Rukia.

"However, I cannot seem to choose one particular piece of music." He added and looked Rukia right into the eyes. Then an idea popped in her mind.

"Well, maybe Nii-sama would let me help him with it?" she asked shyly, believing that maybe he would agree on this one.

He simply nodded at her and moved the chair next to him a little bit as a sign for her to join him. She didn't hesitate for a moment and took her place right beside her brother. Then, she looked at the screen of the device and to her terror, she found out Byakuya chose only few music pieces and they were all classical.

"What do you think about those?" he asked.

"Well… emmm… they are pretty…" she couldn't really find the correct word to describe them. "Pretty sublime."

"B-but… is Nii-sama sure they will fit to the occasion?"

"And you think they won't?"

"Don't misunderstand me Nii-sama. I think they fit you perfectly. But the occasion is rather common so maybe you should pick something also classy but more…" she wanted to say _more normal_ but instead she said "just more common."

"And what do you suggest?"

"Let me see, Nii-sama."

Rukia begun to wander from pages to pages not really sure what she was going to suggest, then suddenly she remembered something. During one of her missions in the living world, as she was staying at Ichigo's house, she was bored so she turned on the radio in his room. Almost all of the songs were pop and rap or something similar to that, but there was one particular piece of music, that she remembered as when it was playing she thought that it would suit her brother perfectly. So not thinking any longer, she tapped the title and the song popped out.

"What is it, Rukia?" Byakuya asked calmly.

"Nii-sama, I think it would fit. I found this one when I was in the world of the living and it was so beautiful, so gentle and sublime that I immediately thought it is just like you." She blurted quickly, not really realizing her words. When however she discovered that second before she just called her brother beautiful and gentle, she blushed heavily.

"I mean… no, I mean yes… you are of course gentle and sublime," she deliberately skipped the word _beautiful_. "but what I wanted to say is that I think this one will suits you, Nii-sama." She blushed even more.

"Yann Tiersen?" he seemed not to pay attention to her jabbering.

"Uh, yes Nii-sama. _La valse d'amelie_ which basically means…"

"Amelia's Waltz." He cut in. "Shall we listen?"

Rukia nodded and pushed one button of the device to play the song she loved so much. As the first tones resounded, she vaguely closed her eyes and sat deeper in her chair. She was waving her hand to the rhythm of the music and suddenly touched something soft and warm. It was a hand, that touched her. But Rukia's mind drifted somewhere else at the very beginning of the song so she took that warm and soft hand in her own without any consideration. She felt warm feeling when those sweet sound surrounded her and when she was holding this soft skin on the unknown hand. When the song finally stopped, she opened her eyes a spoke with a smile.

"What do you think Nii-sama, you think-" but she stopped in the second she realized that Byakuya had rather surprised look on her face. Then she slowly lowered her eyes and to her shock she found out that the hand she was holding so tight was his.

"Oh! I'm sorry Nii-sama, I don't know how it happened!" she blushed almost immediately and tried to pull her hand away, but to her surprise, Byakuya didn't let her go. Instead, his eyes softened and he turned his head back to the device, still not letting her hand out of his.

"I don't know. I think I should play it maybe once more to be sure." He stated and pushed the button with his other hand.

Rukia, not really sure what occurred, stared at Byakuya with shock, but his face didn't say a word about what he was thinking. As the song begun to play again, he lighten his grip a little bit, still holding her, but also giving her a chance to let go. But Rukia didn't. However the situation was extremely odd, the feeling of them holding hands was fantastic. This time, she didn't close her eyes, but she was secretly looking at Byakuya with a soft smile on her lips.

"Well, I think you are right. This song will fit very well for the occasion." He finally pulled his hand back. "now that I've finally managed to deal with this, I have to finish my paperwork before the dinner."

Rukia could only nod, as she was still having mixed emotions about what happened. It was all so strange, and yet so right. She took her way to leave the room but before she reached them, Byakuya told her another thing.

"Rukia."

She turned her head to look at him.

"We should do this more often." His face was still impassive.

"Listening to the music?"

"That too."

* * *

**ok, so here it was, chapter number 3. i hope you liked the idea of a party hard in Soul Society xd**

**i also used the real name of Yann Tiersen song, which is by far the most heartbreaking piece of music i know. do check it out, i think you would see why i chose this one.**

**oh and of course, as always i'll be thrilled if you'll review. see you soon guys! :)**

**sai**


	4. Night walkers

**ok folks, like i promised, chapter 4. i've been recently receving so many nice reviews from you, so i wanted to repay you somehow. this one is a bit shorter (for which i am really sorry) but the next chapter will be all about the upcoming party, so i'll make it up to you. i hope you'll enjoy this one too. have fun! ;)**

* * *

_"We should do this more often."_

_"Listening to the music?"_

_"That too."_

What did he mean by that? Like holding hands… more? Rukia couldn't answer her questions. She didn't know what to think about whole situation as she was replaying it all over in her head. Her mind was corrupted with so many unspoken questions and it begun to haunt her thru days. Three days passed from the evening when she was picking song with her brother and all she was thinking of ever since was _what the hell did he mean by that_. She tried to calm down and focus. Maybe he didn't mean it at all, maybe she overheard. But then again, no – she was analyzing those words very thorough ever since and she was pretty sure it was exactly what he said. _He want to hold hands. With me_. Rukia felt frustrated over not having any clear answers for the matter.

_Ok, Rukia, focus. What do YOU think about it?_ That was another question she had to rethink. Precisely, what did she think about it? Well, she was at shock first, yet the warmth and softness of his hands were corrupting her thoughts. Did she enjoy that feeling? Of course she did, there was no question about that! Did she want to do it again? She would be overjoyed. So what was the problem after all? She was sure that if he'd wish to hold her hand again, she wouldn't mind. She would happily give it to him. Then what's the problem again? Well, the main problem in her head was that she didn't know whether he would really want to and what if not?

* * *

His thoughts were drifting over their evening in the study room. The feeling of her hand was rather suddenly, but he enjoyed it. He knew she was shocked when he said he'd want to do it again and it amused him. She was still so afraid of him that she couldn't just see, how he cared. And that despite his cold appearance, he was still a person, that had feelings like any other, he just didn't show them to everyone. The fact was, he always wanted to be close to her and for her. He just didn't know how to show it. But when she grabbed his hand as if it was something natural, he didn't mind repeating it. It was such a nice feeling, he wouldn't ever dare to reject it.

"Oh, Taichou!" Byakuya's thoughts came back to reality.

"Taichou, there's another thing for the party, I just received a message from the 5th Squad." Renji said, excited.

"What again?"

"So, Hirako-Taichou wants dress all of us in clothes from the living world. I think that's just awesome!"

"Ridiculous idea. Is it necessary?"

"I believe so Taichou. He said Ichigo gave him the idea…"

"Is that so? I see."

"So… could I just walk out a bit earlier today? I have to buy something for myself."

"Have you done all your paperwork?"

"Emm… no, but I will. I promise, Taichou. This one time." Renji almost begged him to let him go as he already promised Matsumoto that they would go together to pick clothes for the party.

Byakuya hesitated for a second, but his thoughts begun to drift away from the topic and instead landed on what Rukia would choose to dress. So he just nodded at Renji, who immediately ran out (afraid that Byakuya would change his mind) and let himself drift with that thought.

* * *

Rukia was wandering from shop to shop, looking for something outstanding for the night. Seireitei was from the early morning – when the first information about new arrangements appeared – a capital of fashion. She didn't even bother herself questioning how did they managed to find so many things in just few hours. She was thinking about something entirely else. What would she want to wear for that evening? Dresses were nice and pretty, but she just couldn't decide. What she needed was a second opinion. Where was Matsumoto when she was needed the most? Rukia was about to leave the shopping for another time, but then she bumped into Nanao, the 8th Division Vice-Captain.

"Oh, Rukia-chan! Gone for shopping too?" Nanao asked and adjusted her glasses.

"Uhm, yes. There are many dresses, but I don't know which one I should choose." Rukia replied, still looking at the clothes.

"Well, what you need is-"

"Oh girls! I was hoping to find you here!" familiar voice was yelling from behind.

When Rukia and Nanao turned their back, they saw Matsumoto, waving towards them.

"Oh, Rangiku. I knew I would find you here in the first place." Nanao said.

"Well, then you've found me! Watcha doin girls? Choosing your dresses for the big night?"

"Well, at least we're trying to." Rukia replied, still a little bit concerned about what to wear.

"How about a little girls' shopping? The three of us will definitely come up with something!" Matsumoto blinked with a flirt in her eyes.

Nanao and Rukia nodded, and soon after the shopping started for good. They were trying hundreds of dresses, having much fun and laughter. Matsumoto was first to pick her dress. She chose a red one, quite short and with huge neckline to expose her big breasts. Nanao was about to buy a dark blue long dress, but then Matsumoto suggested another one and when Nanao saw it she blushed heavily.

"No way I'm going to wear this!" she shouted at Rangiku.

"Girl, your Taichou will be thanking me for the rest of his life for this dress!"

"I don't care about this pervert!" Nanao said, blushing. Rukia and Matsumoto laughed at this statement, because it was well known that Nanao had a big crush for her Captain for many years and although she would never admit that, she liked when he was flirting with her.

"This party is once in a lifetime honey, if not now then when?" Matsumoto asked. "You'll wear it and I don't want to hear any protests!"

"Fine! Whatever!"

Rukia was laughing at her friends, however she was still concerned about not having anything for herself. They were running around for 3 hours and nothing seemed to catch her eye.

"Rukia-chan, I have something especially for you!" Matsumoto giggled. She was carrying a beautiful silver-white long dress. "Put it on and we'll see."

Rukia was amazed. It was indeed the most gorgeous dress she'd ever seen. It was long, with a short train, bare back and a suggestive neckline. She immediately went to put it on and showed herself to girls.

"Oh, woooooow." Nanao said.

"You're buying this one honey. You look totally amazing." He's gonna love it!"

"Who?!" Rukia and Nanao shouted in the same time, though the first one a little bit shocked while the last one very curious.

"Kuchiki-Taichou of course, who else? He's gonna totally fall for you if he hasn't yet."

"You're dating Kuchiki-Taichou? When did it happen? Why I'm the last one to know?!" Nanao shouted shocked.

"I'm telling for the last time. I am not dating Nii-sama. He is my brother for the love of God. I cannot just… date him." Rukia stated but hesitated at the last words, and immediately blushed.

"And why the hell not? I told you once, you're not blood related and he is just so gorgeous that it would be such a waste!"

"Yeah, I don't do it often, but I must agree at this one with Rangiku." Nanao said. "If you like him, date him."

"It's not… it's… he is my brother." Rukia was a little bit lost in her words. And thoughts. "Besides, even if I would… probably, CONSIDER… liking him this way… or dating… well, even if I would, I am a sister to him and it's not going to change."

"Did he tell you that?" Matsumoto asked.

"No! and he doesn't have to. I know it!" Rukia replied sharply. "He doesn't have that kind of feelings for me." She added, unaware of her sad smile.

"Rukia-chan! You have a crush on him?" Matsumoto asked, although she was sure of the true answer before Rukia spoke.

"No! Of course not. He's my Nii-sama."

"Mhm, yeah. We'll talk about it later. And now, we all have dresses for the evening ladies, so let's celebrate it with some sake!"

"Matsumoto! Have you done your paperwork?" a voice came out of nowhere, but Rangiku stiffed as she was immediately sure of its owner.

"Oh Taichou. I didn't know you would be here. Doing shopping?" she asked, making an innocent face.

"But I knew YOU would be here. No sake Matsumoto, you have a work to do!" Hitsugaya finally appeared in front of girls with an icy expression on his face.

"Taichou, but…"

"NOW!"

"Sorry girls, other time then?" Matsumoto asked rhetorically and waved them as a goodbye, walking away with her Captain.

"Well, I have to go too, Nanao-san. It's getting late and Nii-sama doesn't like when I skip dinners with him. See you later!" Rukia said and also walked away.

"I bet he doesn't." Nanao said to herself.

* * *

Rukia was already late for dinner as she walked inside the manor. She rushed quickly to change her clothes and then to the dining room. Byakuya was already there, waiting politely for her to come. She knew he was pissed as she should inform him that she would be late for dinner.

"I'm sorry Nii-sama, I didn't know it was that late." Rukia said and a blush appeared on her cheeks.

"It's alright." He nodded at her, to begin the dinner.

They ate quietly, as usual. But Rukia was excited about her dress and was wondering if really Byakuya would like her in it. _Wait, what? Why am I thinking about that?_ But indeed she was. The idea of him liking the view of her wearing that dress was really corrupting her mind. She wondered if he would actually consider her pretty. Maybe even beautiful. And that thought made her blush. Because maybe she wasn't already aware of it, but frankly she would want to appeal to him.

"Uhm, Nii-sama. Are you going for your walk in the garden tonight?" she asked, trying hardly to get rid of her thoughts.

"Yes. Why?"

"Oh, may I join you? If you of course, don't mind." She asked shyly.

He simply nodded as a sign of approval. The truth was he was looking forward to it. She occupied his thoughts almost all day. He didn't know if he hadn't scared her by his last confession. It was a moment, when words begun to flow before he could rethink them. He meant what he said, but wasn't sure if it was appropriate for him to say things like that. But then, it happened. And now she wanted to spend some time with him, in the garden. Maybe she didn't understand what he said. Or maybe she just ignored the words and wanted things to stay just as they were.

* * *

But the fact was, she hadn't ignored them at all. And she was looking forward to it also. She was even wondering how extraordinary it would be, to hold his hand again. And if he was willing to do it again. And she was impatiently waiting for the night to come. Night walks had some kind of magic. Rukia felt like some sort of an unknown force was making them more special, intimate and bringing her closer to Byakuya. It was like at those night walks in the garden, the distance, the words and whole world just didn't seem to matter anymore as they were all alone, just the two of them.

Finally, she heard some rush in the corridor and she knew it was him, going for a walk. A dark silhouette appeared in front of her paper doors, stopped for a moment, as if waiting, then slowly made its way further to the garden. And Rukia knew, it was a subtle sign, that he wanted her to join him. So not hesitating any longer, she made her way to the garden as well. And there he was, standing in front of the koi pond. At that moment, for the first time maybe, she thought that she just love to observe him. She sighed quietly, and got herself nearer, two steps behind him.

He knew she was there, standing near, but also so far away. He smiled deep down when he felt her reiatsu in the garden. Byakuya knew, she wasn't masking it as if wanting him to know she's there. She stood silent, but no words were necessary, they were enjoying each other's company. It was like time was purposely skipping this place, making the moment eternal, making it special, even if it was really just a moment.

"Does Nii-sama enjoy garden at night?" she broke the silence with the most stupid question, as it was obvious he did, he did it almost every day for years. _Stupid, he now thinks you're retarded Rukia. And so you are_.

"Yes." He replied, not sure if add something or not. "There is something magical in it."

"I think so too. But I think I enjoy it only if-" she stopped at the second she realized what she wanted to say.

"Only if?"

"Oh, nothing Nii-sama." She blushed heavily.

"Continue."

She sighed hardly and for a moment her heart stopped beating and then started rapidly.

"Only if you are here, as well."

If she would standing right beside him, she would notice the smile, that appeared on his lips the moment she ended the sentence. _Only if I am here?_ _Is she really enjoying my company like I do hers?_ He didn't know the answer, but for that moment answers weren't necessary.

"Let's sit." He just replied, as any other words would only harm the moment.

She nodded and sat beside him, keeping small distance. She begun to look at his hand almost immediately. And all the words from the day before came back. Holding his hand. It would be so simple. You just need to take it in yours. Just that and then all this warmth and softness would be there again. _How great it would be…_ No, but she couldn't. It would be improper, not to mention disrespectful of her. She couldn't just invade his space with her hand. Even if it was all she wanted to do. Rukia bite her lip, hardly keeping herself from the idea.

"Rukia." He broke the silence. Finally, he turned his head, and looked her right into the eyes.

His eyes. Those sweet, grey and kind eyes. She could drown in them.

"If you wish to hold my hand again, I think you should not hesitate." He said as if he was reading her mind.

She blushed so heavily, burning from the inside. Oh, how she wanted to do it. Could she? Would he? She slowly pushed her hand towards his in a shyly sign that she indeed, wanted it very much. His hand was also getting nearer. The moment felt like eternity before they reached their way to each other. Finally, the feeling came back to both of them. Sweet and tender, but also very gentle and soft. Byakuya turned his head again, looking ahead. Rukia felt a prick in her heart. What was it? It was only a simple gesture, just holding hands, yet the feeling was so strange and unfamiliar. And also very pleasant.

Did anything happen that night after that? They both couldn't tell. How long did it last? 5 seconds? 5 minutes? An hour? There was no answer. But that night something happened. Something grew inside both of them, unaware of what might happen next. But whatever it was about to happen, it surely would be entirely different, as the night changed something and flicked some kind of a switch, they both didn't know that they had.

* * *

**ok, so that would be it for tonight. next chapter, i promise, will be much longer due to the events that will occur at the party, so watch out. i would really like to thank _Noctis Vee_ Caelum for her reviews and the courage she gave me to write this fic. i'll update soon as i can, i promise you guys.**

**sai**


	5. The Party

**ok so first i have to apologize of this late update, but i was to damn occupied with Roland Garros tournament, i just couldn't focus. but i swear, next updates will be faster. i guess this is the time when the plot is finally getting somewhere. and also, in the previous chapter i picked a song for byakuya but the an idea popped in my mind to give all the captains their songs. and maybe it's stupid, but i had a great time finding the right song for each of them. so do check it out and tell me if they fit. and of course have a good time with this chapter.**

* * *

The day of the party came faster than anyone expected. All Shinigami's were occupied with last preparations. Ichigo and company arrived early in the morning but were immediately taken away by Hirako to help with decorations and all sort of party stuff. Everyone were excited about the upcoming party and Rukia was no exception. But her mind was also occupied with something other than a party. She began to feel strange for past few days as something definitely had changed. What was it? It was her brother. What happened, what was so different? She wanted to get her answers, but it seemed there was no way of doing so. Nearly 55 years passed and he was never like that before. Their relation thru all this years was proper, sometimes cold and for most of the times just simply silent. _He_ was silent, as she had many things that she wanted to tell him. But there was no way of doing so. She always felt he wouldn't appreciate her honesty, but rather he would find it very disrespectful. That was what she thought before. Now, now she hadn't got a clue what was proper and respectful and what wasn't. Before, she would never imagine herself even coming nearer him, and now… now they were holding hands almost every day. To be precise, every night, as it always happened at their night walks. And ever since it happened for the first time, she was waiting almost whole day for another night to come. Just to be closer, just to feel him, even if for a moment. Maybe even if it meant nothing for him – to her it was everything.

But it meant much for him. Byakuya was also waiting for those night walks. Before things began to change, he was alone almost every night in the garden. And although he was finding it very calming and peaceful, there was something inside of him, that wasn't complete. Like something he was missing. But then it suddenly changed. He was lonely all those years and unaware of the feelings he had inside. And now, he finally felt it. Like the picture was almost complete and he didn't have to wonder what he was missing, anymore.

* * *

Rukia was ready for the early dinner at the manor. She had already arranged meeting with Matsumoto and Nanao soon after, for them to get ready for the party. She was so excited about the party she wasn't even hungry, but she wanted to spend some time with Byakuya. Rukia rushed towards the dining room, and there he was, sitting as always, silent and calm. She placed herself next to him and he nodded at her.

"Nii-sama, are you going at the party after dinner?" she asked.

"Yes. As soon as I change myself I'm heading to the main hall." His face was impassive.

"Oh, and what you're going to wear?"

"I don't know yet, I haven't decided. And you?"

"I want it to be a surprise. You will find out when you arrive at the party." She smiled lightly and blushed.

"Then I guess I'll have to hurry." He answered and made her blush even more. Then he grabbed her hand in his and looked her right into the eyes. "I hope you will spare me a moment at the party."

"O-of course, Nii-sama. It will be my pleasure." She blushed heavily at this sudden gesture. "I'll see you there, then."

He pulled his hand back and nodded calmly at her. She smiled at him, and left the dining room. He smiled to himself, but the truth was it wasn't a moment of her time he was hoping – it was all of her time. Byakuya sighed quietly, as he was alone again. Then he finished his dinner and went to prepare himself for the party as well. Maybe after all it wouldn't be such a waste of time.

* * *

As Rukia finally made her way to Matsumoto's room the rest of the invited girls were already there. Nanao, Kotetsu Isane and Orihime. They were admiring each other's dresses and gossiping about with who they should dance. Rukia smiled lightly as it was a really cheerful atmosphere.

"Oh, Rukia-san. Finally here. Go, put your gorgeous dress on and then we'll begin the preparations!" Matsumoto said, winking.

"Pre-pa-ra-tions?" Rukia syllabified the last word.

"Of course honey. Some make-up is required! Orihime brought us so many fantastic things!"

"But I don't want any make-up!"

"Don't be silly. Don't you want to knock him out?" Matsumoto gave Rukia another wink.

"Who?!" Orihime and Kotetsu screamed almost in tandem.

"Oh man, here we go again…" Rukia sighed. "You have to stop spreading this gossip. People might actually believe it at some point!"

"But who?!" not privy to the matter girls asked again.

"Well, Matsumoto has this crazy idea of me and Nii-sama dating."

"And are you?!"

"Of course I am not, silly."

"Well, maybe not yet, but after this night it may change, you know." Matsumoto stated. "Man, am I really the only person that thinks they would make such a lovely couple?"

"Oh no, Rangiku. I'm with you." Nanao finally spoke.

"Actually… it crossed my mind. Once or twice." Kotetsu spoke shyly.

"Kuchiki-Taichou is such a handsome man, Kuchiki-san. I agree with the girls." Orihime stated.

"What is wrong with you people? He is my freakin brother!" Rukia shouted.

"Oh girl, we've talked about it already. Besides I have eyes and I see that there's definitely something going on!" Matsumoto gave Rukia a slight smile.

Rukia hesitated for a second. Indeed, there was something going on, but she wasn't sure what was it and it bugged her ever since. Then she remembered her night walks in a second, and blushed heavily.

"So there is something going on!" Matsumoto caught Rukia's blush. "Go on, confide!"

"There is nothing to confide, I think…" Rukia said sharply.

"Yes, of course. And that's the reason why you suddenly turned red! Speak, Kuchiki Rukia, the secret's safe with us!" Matsumoto said, pretending to be very serious.

"Well, there is something…"

"Oh god, I just knew it!" Matsumoto giggled with excitement.

"Shut up or I won't say a word!"

"Ok, ok. Continue."

"Like I was saying. It may be nothing but for some time we're like… you know… holding hands."

"And what else?!" Matsumoto couldn't bear her excitement.

"Nothing else. Just that. Just holding hands."

"No kissing? Cuddling? No sex?"

"NOOOOOO!" Rukia yelled and blushed so heavily that for a second she thought it was a flame straight from the hell that was burning her cheeks.

"I'm a little bit disappointed." Matsumoto said.

"Well, Rangiku, not everybody is like you. Maybe they're taking it slow." Nanao said and adjusted her glasses.

"Well then after this night it's definitely going to change!" Matsumoto said.

"But Matsumoto, don't spread the rumors anymore. If it's nothing like that…" Rukia said.

"Oh sure honey. From now on, it's our secret and my personal mission to get you together!" Rangiku finally stated.

"Oh man…" Rukia only sighed.

And the preparations began for good. Girls were finally changing their clothes and putting make-up on. Time was passing quickly as the desired party was yet to come. Now, ready and excited, the girls' group were making their way to the party.

Byakuya was a little bit restless. He didn't like the idea of the party at first, finding it meaningless and unnecessary. However, during past few days he had changed his mind, although he still had some concerns. As he was choosing what to wear, staring at the pile of shirts and pants, his mind drifted away. Byakuya was thinking about Rukia, which was no surprise, as he was doing it almost every day for past few days. On the one hand, he was a little bit excited (though his face was telling otherwise) about meeting Rukia there, but on the other hand, he was concerned that she would be too busy with other people that she would completely forget his existence. Byakuya took a look at clothes on the bed. _That should not bother me, at all._ Maybe it shouldn't, but it did. The thought of her dancing and laughing with Kurosaki Ichigo made him irritated. A bit of jealousy perhaps? _No, no. I am not jealous._ But there was something definitely going on in his mind that made those mixed emotions overwhelm him. He was thinking if Rukia was really enjoying his company and proximity. Well, he didn't know but at least it was obvious that she liked to hold his hand, as she did it so many times during past few days that it became like a new habit. Of course, a secret habit because none of them wanted to ruin his cold and impassive reputation. He thought she enjoyed that proximity because she never really received any from her brother before. Suddenly, the word 'brother' made him irritated, though he didn't know why.

Finally, Byakuya picked some clothes and went to the bathroom to change himself. As he was eventually satisfied with his appearance, he looked at the clock only to realize that it was high time to leave. He stepped out of his room and made his way towards the party. His thoughts drifted away, as the only thing he had in mind was seeing Rukia.

* * *

The main hall changed completely. It was now decorated with silver, white and black balloons. There were some tables, some kind of stage under one of the walls with some sort of strange devices and the center of the room was empty, becoming a dance floor this time. People were already gathering for the party, some chatting with each other. Hirako Shinji was there from the early afternoon, giving last orders to his officers. He was wearing white narrow pants, grey shirt and black tie. He wanted to wear something more casual, but Hiyori's flip-flop on his face made him think otherwise. The first Captains to arrive were Kyoraku and Ukitake as it could be expected. The first one was wearing dark pants, pink, silk shirt and black suspenders while Ukitake was wearing white shirt under also white sweater and black pants, with his hair tied. They waved to Hirako and sat down at one of the tables. Next, Captain General Yamamoto alongside with Komamura stepped in. As it could be expected, Captain General was wearing a classic, black tailcoat while Komamura, to everyone's surprise was wearing the biggest white, long-sleeved shirt with black tie and black pants. That view certainly made people staring at those two. But not for so long, as few moments later Captain Kurotsuchi and Unohana also arrived. And that was probably the biggest shock to everyone. Unohana was wearing a green, sparkling, knee-length dress which wasn't that much of a surprise, but Kurotsuchi Mayuri outdid himself by not wearing any make-up (literally, none), purple shirt and pants alongside with green tie. When did exactly this lunatic become such a normal and even handsome person? People jaws practically dropped instantly. But never mind that gut, because it was probably another of his strange jokes.

Byakuya bumped into Hitsugaya and Kenpachi, also looking slightly ridiculous, as he thought. Hitsugaya was wearing white shirt and pants with light blue tie, while Kenpachi was wearing black shirt and black pants. The three entered the hall and greeted everyone inside. That was definitely time to start the party, as almost every invited guest was already there. Like it could be expected, Soi Fon was sitting right next to Yoruichi, staring at her with admiration and Urahara was there too, making jokes. The Visards group gathered together at one of the tables near Ichigo and his gang. Every Captain and almost every Vice-Captain was there already, so the main question was… where were our pretty girls?

"Oh they are always late Taichou." Renji started a conversation with Byakuya.

"Who?"

"Oh the girls. Matsumoto and Nanao. And I don't see Rukia anywhere around either."

Byakuya only nodded as indeed he was looking around ever since he got there but he didn't find her.

"You look… very different Taichou. Girls here are staring at you."

"It's not my concern at all, Abarai." Byakuya said coldly, because frankly, he didn't care about all the other girls as his mind was occupied with only one.

"The party will start in a moment and-" then Renji stopped short as girls finally arrived at the party. "WOW!"

Certainly, they made a great enter. Renji was first staring at Rukia, then his eyes went to Matsumoto and his jaw dropped. He was burbling something under his nose with eyes wide open.

But Byakuya was not paying attention to his Vice-Captain or Matsumoto. His eyes widen in shock for a brief moment, however his face remained expressionless. But inside of him, something stir up. When he saw Rukia in her dress his whole body trembled. He was amazed in every meaning of the word. He wanted to approach her instantly, but refrained himself. He just stood there, staring at her and his world began to spin around.

* * *

Rukia, Matsumoto and all the other girls were a bit late, but arrived just in time for the party to start. As they finally stepped in the hall, Matsumoto looked around and made her way to Renji, who seemed to look like a retard with his mouth opened. Kotetsu approach her Captain and so did Nanao. Orihime was instantly taken away by amazed Ichigo and soon after, Rukia was all alone. She looking around the hall when suddenly, she saw him. She blushed almost immediately as he was probably the most handsome man at the party. His hair cut loose, he was wearing dark red shirt, slightly unbuttoned with a black vest on it, narrow black pants and oxford shoes. He looked just like a model on those color magazines that Orihime was showing before.

Byakuya and Rukia were staring at each other, in shock and amazement. She smiled at him and was ready to decrease the distance between them, but suddenly a wild voice resounded.

"Ok people! It's time to get the party started!" Hirako was talking to the microphone. "I see you're all wearing fantastic outfits, that's really outstanding. But now we shall begin the presentations! The song and the skit of every Division, beginning with number one!"

Captain General stepped aside and nodded at someone to get the music started. His Squad song was "Riders on the storm" The Doors, and everyone agreed that was the most suitable song for him. When the song ended, Vice-Captain Sasakibe tried to pretend his Captain with so-so outcome as it was very hard to act like his Captain and also making it funny.

Next one was Soi Fon and her "Little bit" by Lykke Li. That one seemed to fit her very well, especially when considering her affection for Yoruichi. Omaeda tried to pretend her bankai but was so clumsy with it, people were laughing at him. Nevertheless the purpose of the skit was achieved. People were laughing.

The 3rd Squad Captain Otoribashi came up with Carlos Gardel's "Por una cabeza" and his Vice-Captain Kira, with his always gloomy face began to spout something about the beauty of the fight and other snooty things, which maybe wasn't that funny after all, but fitted Otoribashi quite well.

Then Unohana provided a little shock for the party guest as her song was Aretha Franklin's "Respect". She was crooning the song and people wouldn't dare to even smile, though the situation was a bit amusing. Then, Kotetsu Isane did her best to look calm but also very powerful, but was so shy to do so, she blushed immediately.

Hirako, as it could be expected due to his love for jazz, picked "Feeling good" by Nina Simone and soon after the song ended, Hinamori appeared with a vicious smile on her face, talking something with a slang and making funny faces, which was indeed all like her Captain, so even Hirako was amused at her acting.

Then it was Byakuya turn to do the presentation. "La valse d'Amelie" of Yann Tiersen began to play to everyone's shock, as they were certain that he would choose something more stiff. Then, Renji began to pretend his Captain, standing silent at first, then talking something about differences in levels and at the end he just said "_Chire, Senbonzakura_" what made pretty much everybody laughing. And Byakuya was silently abiding the act, looking at Rukia, who was laughing heavily.

Captain Komamura came up with "Dust bowl dance" by Mumford and Sons and then Iba pretended to be a dog, what made a huge laugh among people. Well, maybe except Komamura himself, as he wondered what was so funny about it.

Then Kyoraku appeared alongside with Nanao. As it was her duty to choose the song, she wanted to do a little revenge and soon after Right Said Fred's "I'm too sexy" began to play. Then, Nanao was standing with a sake bottle, burbling about the girls and more sake. It was just like her Captain.

Kensei and Hisagi, came up with "Helicopter" by Bloc Party and Hisagi did his best to look like his Captain, while Mashiro was herself and was just kicking and teasing poor Hisagi as she would do Kensei.

Irritated Hitsugaya left the choice to Matsumoto, so he was little bit surprised when Tegan and Sara's "My number" began to play. However it was obvious the song referred to his relationship with Hinamori. Matsumoto was then running around, screaming her name repeatedly and saying something about paperwork. And that made Hitsugaya even more irritated with her than he already was.

The hardcore 11th Squad Captain and his little Vice-Captain picked Guns'n'Roses' "Welcome to the jungle", of course. Then little Yachiru was running around with katana in her hand, yelling about more opponents to slash.

Then, Kurotsuchi Mayuri, still making people look in a shock, turned on "Fun for me" by Moloko. That was indeed, the most suitable song of all the others. After that, Nemu, calm at first, began to laugh as if she was insane, asking people would they participate some experiments. People laughed, unaware that she was serious.

Last, but not the least, Ukitake played his beloved "Perfect day" by Lou Reed. Soon after, Rukia, pretending to be her Captain, appeared in front of Hitsugaya, proposing him a sack of sweets, what made him very, very angry, as he still not overcame after Matsumoto's skit.

"Ok people, that was the last Squad. Now, enjoy the party and each other's company and just have fun! Music!" Hirako shouted, ending the first part of the party.

* * *

People were walking around, chatting, dancing eating and drinking. Matsumoto placed herself at the big table with loads of sake bottles in front and Renji next to her. Soon Kira and Hisagi joined them as well. After some time, their table became the most entertaining spot at the party. They were drinking a lot of sake and gossiping about people clothes, dancing skills and Matsumoto breasts. Ichigo and his gang joined them as well, making the table even more entertaining. That was a sign that party started for good.

Some Captains were dancing, some were just sitting and drinking. Soi Fon was all around Yoruichi for most of her time, Kenpachi was thinking when would be a proper moment to challenge Ichigo and Kyoraku was already half drunk, trying to pick up Nanao.

Byakuya on the other hand, was standing alone for most of the time, except the part when he was refusing dancing with women that approached him. He was silently observing Rukia, who was dancing for most of her time. He wanted to approach her, however every time he was about to do so, someone was faster and before he had a chance to realize what happened, Rukia was already dancing with someone else. So instead of doing something, he just stood there, praying for something to happen.

It was her tenth dance and Rukia felt a little bit exhausted. She really needed a drink. She made her way to the table, and grabbed a glass of water. Man, ever since she stepped in the hall, people were all around her, men wanting her to dance with them. However what really occupied her mind was why _he_ of all the people didn't came to her. He saw him standing against the wall for most of the time, calm and expressionless as always. She knew he never liked those kind of events, but before she got there, she was sure that he would at least come to talk to her. But that didn't happen. And Rukia felt sad, because maybe she was a little bit irritated with Matsumoto talking about them, but somehow she wanted him to notice her. And for heaven's sake do something! And when she was ready to give up hoping, a familiar deep voice spoke behind her.

"May I have this dance?" Byakuya finally got his chance.

"Oh, Nii-sama. I didn't know you would want to dance…" indeed, she was sure he didn't, as she saw him refusing all the girls before.

"If I have to let someone invade my private space then I would want you to do it and nobody else."

Rukia blushed heavily. _Oh god, why does he have to say such things to me?_ She didn't even notice the moment when he grabbed her hand and led her to the dance floor. They were dancing for less than a minute, when suddenly music change into a slow note. Rukia stiffed as it was obvious that he surely wouldn't want to dance to this kind of music. But to her surprise he did something entirely else, to her disbelief. He pulled her closer and embraced her tight. She was shocked like hell, but she embraced him back and soon after the began dancing again. She felt his slow moves, so gentle, so subtle. Rukia hid her head in his chest and could easily feel his scent. Then it all came back to her. The sweet sakura blossom fragrance. Something she desired the most, something that she could drown into.

"Rukia." He finally broke the silence.

"Mmm?" was all she could say in those conditions.

"You look absolutely astonishing tonight."

That was just too much for her. She turned red instantly and felt fire on her cheeks. Oh god, how she needed a cold shower. How could he say such things just like that? And what was she supposed to reply? her head was overheating.

"You… look, too…" she said shyly and immediately felt next wave of heat at her cheeks.

They didn't say a word till the end of the dance. Each of them was hoping for that moment to last forever. That proximity was overwhelming them both. _If I could just pick one moment, I want this one to never end – _she thought. And God only knows, he was thinking the same. When the song eventually came to its end, Byakuya did his very best to just let her go, though all he wanted to do was exactly the opposite. A sudden sadness overcame him, but that was the proper thing to do. Just to let her go and thank for the dance.

She saw him thanking for the dance, and she could swear his always impassive face changed for a second and his eyes held some sort of sad expression. Why was he sad? She couldn't tell, because she was too occupied with her own disappointment. She wanted to ask him if he would dance with her one more time, but before she had a chance to open her mouth, he turned his back and walked away. Rukia stood there, all alone, and felt something heavy on her chest as soon as he disappeared.

* * *

"Rukiaaaa… come here girl, sit with us!" Ichigo shouted.

Rukia sat next to Renji and Matsumoto and grabbed a glass of water. She was still a little bit sad about the sudden disappearance of her brother.

"Why so sad girl?" Ichigo asked his friend.

"I'm not sad, idiot. I'm just really exhausted!"

"Uuuuu… I bet you are Rukia-chan!" drunk Matsumoto spoke and was willing to say something more, but Rukia gave her a sharp look. But then, unaware of the sudden secrecy of the topic, Renji blurted.

"I see you're doing really good with my Taichou!"

"She's doing what?!" Ichigo asked shocked.

"Didn't you know? Oh man, you're uninformed. Rukia is dating my Taichou!" Renji was suddenly nipped by Matsumoto. "Auch! What?!"

"You're dating you brother?!" Ichigo asked in disbelief.

"I am not dating anyone, you moron. It's just Renji and Matsumoto having fun of saying so."

"O-oh. Thanks God, because I thought you've gone mad or something."

"Why you think so Ichigo? I still think they would make a gorgeous couple!" Matsumoto said.

"Gorgeous couple, my ass. Byakuya is as cold as an iceberg. It's like dating a freakin refrigerator!"

"Don't say that about Nii-sama! He isn't like that at all. He is very warm and gentle, it's that he just doesn't like to show it in public." Rukia was defending Byakuya very hard.

"Oh yes. And to him public is like pretty much everyone."

"That's not true! He is very warm, to me!" She blurted and instantly blushed. Why did that moron make her saying such thing? But Matsumoto still not that drunk not to notice what was happening, changed the subject.

"Well, don't argue about our jokes. Ichigo, I think that Orihime would like you to dance with her very much, so go."

Ichigo turned his head to Orihime, who was in fact, waiting for him to approach. He snapped his finger at the matter, and took his girl to the dance floor. Then, Matsumoto swayed Rukia from the table for a little girls talk.

"What's the matter honey? You really seem to be sad." Rangiku asked.

"Well, it's that Nii-sama wasn't paying attention to me at all but then suddenly he appeared out of nowhere and asked me to dance."

"That's good… I guess?"

"Yes, and he said that if he has to let someone invade his private space he want me to do it."

"Well, I never thought Kuchiki-Taichou is such a flirt!"

"And then, when we danced, he said I look astonishing."

"Now see honey, that was exactly what I've told you! So, what happened next?"

"Nothing. Song ended and he thank me for the dance. And then he just walked away."

"And you did nothing about it?"

"What was I supposed to do?"

"Oh girl, do I have to teach you everything? You just let him go away? Then go to him and ask him to dance again! And then find some nice, cozy and silent place and…"

"Matsumoto!"

"Just go and find him and pray to God he will make the next move."

Rukia looked around for Byakuya, but he was nowhere to be seen. She asked few people if they had seen him, but nobody did, he just vanished. She felt sad and disappointed because as soon as she gathered strength to actually do something, that her heart was rushing her to do, he just simply disappeared. Frustrated, she was ready to give up, but then someone spoke.

"Looking for someone?" It was Hitsugaya, calmly sipping juice.

"Oh, well, I'm looking for Nii-sama, Hitsugaya Taichou." She answered shyly.

"I think I saw him leaving towards the garden."

"Thank you, Hitsugaya-Taichou!"

She ran off almost immediately, making her way to the garden where she was hoping to find someone that she couldn't be without any longer.

* * *

After the dance, he felt a sudden need to take a walk. Emotions were overwhelming him. Byakuya decided that a walk in the garden is what he needed to calm his feelings. What was so special about that dance, that it made him feel this way? Slowly, his thoughts began to crystallize. It was not about the dance, at all. It was about her, about her warm body embracing him… he had to run away, otherwise he would do something terrible immediately. And there was no way he would do such a thing to his beloved sister. Sister, brother. Oh God, how those words hurt his heart. It began to be too obvious to him that he didn't treat her like a sister anymore. But he was a brother to her, his duty was to protect her and to disgrace by his foolish actions. Whatever those feelings he had were, they should definitely remain silent. And all those words that he wanted to tell her, had to stay unspoken.

But before he calmed himself completely, something broke the silence.

"Nii-sama…" Rukia said, finally finding him at the end of the garden.

"Why did you leave so quickly? I thought we could, maybe…" she did her best to say what she meant, but she suddenly lost confidence.

"Maybe what?" He asked with his face impassive, but inside he was shaking.

"I don't know, maybe dance. I know that you don't particularly appreciate such events, but I thought that maybe if I just…"

"If you just what?"

"If I… just… I don't… if we…" she tried very hard to give a meaning to her words.

Suddenly, he approached her, staring in those lovely violet eyes. He took both of her hands and she blushed heavily but was unable to let her eyes off him. They were standing in front of each other, but the tense between them was almost unbearable. Byakuya was doing his best not to capture her in his desire, but he couldn't let his eyes off her and it was killing him.

"I'm overpowered." Was all he could said, as his was face coming closer to hers.

She drowned in his grey eyes. She couldn't move, those eyes were calling her. If there was a chance to escape before, she definitely missed it. It was too late to retreat. All there was, was him and all she wanted was him.

"With what?" She asked almost whispering as she was so close to him. Too close.

"With you."

And that was it. That was all he could tell before his soft lips touched hers and the whole world exploded.

* * *

**ok, so apparently some kind of cliffhanger appeared here. don't be mad though, coz i'm in a middle of next chapter and i'll update as soon as i finish. anyway, hope you liked the songs, dances and of course out little loving birds finally making their way to each other. well, i definitely liked that!**

**i would like to thank you for the reviews and messages very, very much. they mean a lot to me and i'm really looking forward to see some more. so don't be shy, review people. see you later, then! ;)**

**sai**


	6. Overpowered

**I'm updating like some mad man. I just can't keep myself from doing so as the words are disemboguing. So I decided not to keep them from you. And I would like to thank you for all the reviews and PMs, encouraging me to do so. It's really more fun to write when I know that you actually enjoy reading my stuff. Anyway, here's chapter 6. It's a bit shorter than the 5th, but I didn't want to leave a cliffhanger like the previous time. And as I'm updating every two days, I think you'll manage somewhow with this only. Have fun guys.**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Bleach. Yet.**

* * *

The world indeed exploded. There was nothing left, nothing except their kiss. And the itself was exceptional from the very beginning. The way they melt into one existence in such a brief moment was one of a kind. His lips searching for the answers only she could give. Her hand caressing his cheeks as if they wanted to catch that precious moment. Was it a moment? Nobody could tell. It felt like eternity captured in that intimate gesture. His hands wandering about her fragile waist as if it was a first time ever. Gentle, subtle but also passionate and insatiable. It was like a true awaking. Like they were asleep all those years, captured in a purposeless dream, but now for the first time they opened their eyes to see real world. They kissed and everything else was meaningless but also everything made sense. If they weren't sure what they had in hearts before, the kiss was the true answer. Finally the real answer they've been searching ever since he laid his eyes on her and she shyly looked at him too. The way their tongues moved in this unique dance made them longing for more. More of everything. The well of their desires was bottomless.

Rukia was sure she finally found meaning of her life. Whatever questions she was asking herself before, now she knew answers. He was her meaning. All along, it was always him. It didn't happen now, or the day before. It was long time ago, before she knew such thing as love existed. But now she did. Eventually it all went to him. Maybe she didn't get all her answers, but that time, she didn't care. For that moment was definitely out of ordinary. And she prayed it could last forever. As in that exact moment eternity was a possibility.

Byakuya didn't care what would happen next. Even if the world would hate him, even if he would be banished forever from this world – it didn't matter anymore. Why should it as all he ever wanted was right beside him, caressing his cheeks and kissing him so deeply? There was nothing, nothing more. She was all he dreamt of. How can one man experience so much in just one kiss? It made him complete. With this kiss, he handed her a dagger pointed right at his heart, trusting she would never stab him. His invulnerable shield, his armor of glass was shattered. His heart exposed to her. Whatever reasons made him build that castle of ice around his soul ultimately ended the moment she laid her lips on his.

Suddenly, he stiffened. Something was wrong, definitely strange. He pulled his lips from her, looking in her shocked, violet eyes. He knew she was searching for an answer for this sudden gesture. He lowered his head once again, placing his lips next to her ear.

"Rukia, go home." His deep voice froze her within seconds.

"But… I… you…"

"Go. Go home and wait for me."

She looked at him with a question, but obediently turned her back and was about to run home. But before she managed to make few steps, he spoke again.

"Rukia." She looked at him again. He shunpoed to her and kissed her passionate.

"Just wait for me there, please."

Her eyes widen in shock as she had never heard him asking. Never in her entire life. She ran out of the garden and in few seconds he was standing in the middle of the garden alone. Once again. He sighed and his face changed into usual impassive expression.

"Shihoin Yoruichi, how long you've been spying me?" he asked coldly.

Dark silhouette jumped off the roof and appeared next to him with joyful expression.

"Long enough, Byakuya-Bo!"

"What do you want?"

"Well, don't be so rude! I'm surprised actually. You never told me you were into Rukia."

"This is none of your business."

"Of course it's mine! I want to see my Byakuya happy with a girl."

"Stop playing your games, were-cat!"

"Do you always have to be such a pain in the ass?"

"Watch your language, I'm warning you."

"I always thought it was me you were in love with, ehh… but Rukia will do. She's such a nice girl."

"If interrupting me was your only reason to show up here, then consider it accomplished and leave."

"Oh, Byakuya-Bo, you're not fun at all." She sighed.

Byakuya was about to leave the garden and run towards his mansion, but Yoruichi shunpoed right in front of him with serious expression this time.

"If you mess this up, I assure you, I'll never stop teasing you." After that she shunpoed elsewhere, leaving him alone.

But Shihoin Yoruichi was not his concern any more. He had to go to the manor and speak to Rukia. He had to tell her what he felt for once.

* * *

Rukia was running towards the manor without a break. Her heart was pounding so fast, she was sure it would eventually beat itself out. She was running with such speed, she began considering being faster than Yoruichi, Soi Fon and Byakuya all together that time. Man, she was running so fast, she approached home within seconds. And what now? _Should I really wait for him? He told me to wait. Well, actually… he asked me to. This is certainly my top 5 strange situation._ What was she supposed to do? What the hell did that kiss mean? If there was any book with answers to her questions, she would definitely use it. However there was none. Her lips burned as hell. Even after all that time, she could still feel his touch, his kisses. She blushed heavily at that thought. Rukia wasn't thinking straight at all. All she could think of that time was, _is he going to repeat it? Man, I would definitely want him to do it._ She was all excited, smiling to herself like some kind of retard. However the situation was a bit awkward and strange as he was technically her brother, she couldn't care less. After all this time of sadness, insecurity and endless battlefield she assumed that any kind of social disapproval was meaningless. Now, the man of her dreams, the one she was longing to, the one touches she has been craving for, was finally kissing her. _Kissing me, touching, caressing. Think of other things he could do to you… NO! wait. Slow Rukia. He was kissing you ten minutes ago and now you're thinking of OTHER things? Kuchiki Rukia, you're such a pervert. _But indeed, nothing mattered that time. The only question was did he reciprocate those feelings? Maybe it was just only a moment of weakness? But then again, he kissed her twice. And asked her to wait for him. And there was no sign of any regret. Definitely he wasn't regretting those kisses. And now, any second, he would appear here and might actually repeat it. _Why are you so desperate for those kisses? You're such a bad girl. Bad, baaad girl Rukia._

* * *

Byakuya was in front of the manor, but stopped just before entering. What was he supposed to say? That yes, he indeed want to repeat it? Again and again? Now that wasn't like him at all. But then again, it was all he wanted to do. Why should he hold back? Especially if he was holding back for over fifty years. There was no way he was going to let it go this time. Not when all the ices shattered. There was no going back. She belongs to him, and if there was even the slightest chance than she might share his feeling, so be it. He was already hers anyway. And nothing could change that, no matter what. So why not just dive into it? All he wanted to do that time, was to just approach her and kiss her endlessly for the stars to fall of the sky and the world to explode. But before he would let his longings overwhelm him, he needed to talk to her. As there were indeed some things unresolved.

Byakuya finally stepped into the manor, focusing on her reiatsu, that led him into the garden. _Of course she's there. Where else could she be?_ He smiled to himself and made his way under one of the sakura trees. She was there, beautiful as always. Just looking at her made him stronger and weak at the same time.

"Rukia." He made few steps, but stopped himself to give her space.

"Nii-sama…" she turned her head to him.

"Considering ensuing circumstances, addressing me as a brother is no longer appropriate."

She blushed madly. Indeed, kissing him and calling him brother was a bit awkward. That, she had to admit. But how was she supposed to call him? By his name? _Is he actually asking me to call him by his name?_

"So… how should I… address you?"

"You know my name, Rukia."

Now she was sure he just went mad. No way she was going to call him THAT.

"B-but… I…"

"No but's. If I'm going to kiss you again, would you want me to call you sister?" a small teasing smile appeared on his lips.

Her eyes widen in disbelief. He was actually telling her to call him by his name and then he smiled. It wasn't just him, the whole world just went mad and she was the only person who remained sane.

"Say it."

"Byakuya…" she said it the fastest she could and then closed her eyes as she was sure that was the moment when thunderbolt would just strike her head.

But nothing happened. No world's end, no thunderbolts. She survived. Suddenly, he approached her, standing just inches from her. Way too close to even think straight.

"Now, it didn't hurt, did it?"

"Not exactly…" she looked into his misty, grey eyes. And questions she was asking herself before, reappeared just in time.

What was this situation at all? Where was it heading to? And, after all, what the hell was he thinking? Because surely his face wasn't helping in finding any of those answers.

"What does it mean?" she finally encouraged herself to ask a direct question.

"It means something definitely ended here." He paused. Her eyes were calling him to kiss those sweet lips of hers. But before, just one more thing.

"But something else started instead." He finished his sentence and was ready to kiss her, but she pulled her head away just in time.

"That's all?" she asked. Well, he was a silent person, of course, but her mind was demanding some more specific answers. For that something started she already knew.

"That's all I know for now. But I assure you, I am very eager to find out what is it precisely."

Now that was a better answer. This time, she couldn't resist and kissed him herself. She touched his cheeks, enclosing the distance between them. It was a soft kiss, reassuring one, for him to know that she gladly accepted his answers and found it sufficient. But then he pulled back and looked her deeply in the eyes.

"And you? What does it mean to you?" he asked.

"I am very eager for you to find out what is it." She answered him teasingly.

He looked at her and smiled. She found that smile very irresistible. He kissed her gently, slowly discovering the mysteries of her lips. There was no rush, he wanted to learn the taste of those lips, to remember it and carve it into his heart. He could feel her scent, creeping deeply into his head. He embraced her tightly, feeling her small body over his. She moaned at this sudden closeness and he found that sound caressing his heart. With every touch, they craved for more. And the more they got, the desire became overwhelming.

He had to stop right there for in any minutes there would be no turning back. And he knew that it was not the time. After all, Kuchiki Byakuya, was only a man. He had to pull back, otherwise he couldn't make the best of the situation step by step. And she would want him to. However the desire between became too great, there were still some issues to find out and taking it too fast wouldn't help in finding those. With all his strength, he pulled back, still embracing her tightly.

"We should go sleep now." He finally said, heavy-hearted.

"But…" Rukia tried to stop him, as the disappointment suddenly overwhelmed her whole body.

"There's still tomorrow." He laid his index finger on her lips.

She sighed very heavy. The party, dancing with him, the night… it was magical, but she wasn't sure if when the next day would come, he would feel the same. Maybe he would eventually come to a conclusion that it was a mistake. Beautiful, exceptional and mind-blowing. But still, a mistake.

As if reading her mind, he kissed her cheeks and then lips.

"Tomorrow will change nothing." He claimed and somehow she felt relieved.

Byakuya walked her to her room, still not believing that it was actually happening. What he felt, was entirely else than what he ever received before. His mind was spinning. He felt like a teenager again. Always self-restrained, cold Byakuya was actually feeling something else than this nothingness and emptiness. He felt alive again. And it was only the beginning.

Rukia didn't want the moment to end. She was still hardly believing that he was there. _Hers._ He assured her there would be tomorrow, but she didn't want for tomorrow to come. She wanted the night to last forever. Forever in his embrace, feeling his touch, his softness. His sweet sakura blossom sent all over her. If she had to believe him that the dawn wouldn't bring disappointment, then he had to make the moment last forever.

"Stay." She said, for the first time that sure of what she wanted.

He sent her a puzzled expression.

"Just be with me. Be here, when I wake up so I will be sure I wasn't dreaming."

Byakuya smiled at her. The words were unnecessary. He followed her to the bedroom and placed himself next to her, as she laid herself on the futon. He embraced her tightly, breathing in her scent. He closed his eyes, only for his senses to heighten. If there was any place in the world he considered home, that her tiny arms were it. He smiled upon himself.

"I love the way you smell." He whispered into her ear.

She turned red immediately on those words. How could he make her so powerless with just few words. She took is hand and pulled it tightly to her chest. The feeling was warm, almost overwhelming. From that moment she wouldn't be able to experience peaceful sleep unless he was next to her, of that she was sure. Whatever tomorrow might bring, she was ready for it, as the man of her dreams, as all her longings were right beside her. There was no way to let it go, as that night gave her a precise purpose for living. As her dreams were finally named. And she knew that was his name engraved in her heart and mind.

* * *

"Kisuke, you were right about this party." Yoruichi said.

"Naaa, see Yoruichi-san. I told you it will all be fun."

"Yes, but I didn't think it would _that_ fun."

"What do you mean? Something happened?"

"Oh, let's just say I have to stay a little longer to be sure."

"You're always so mysterious. Why won't you tell me?"

"Come on Kisuke, women have to have some secrets."

"I believe you have some strong reasons to stay here then."

"Well my dear friend. Today was an exceptional day. But the real fun is yet to come."

* * *

**Well, it isn't much a cliffhanger, is it? What do you think? Like it, don't like it? I've read countless of ByaRuki fics and there's always pretty much the same point when they finally kiss, but are unsure about the other's feelings so they part, there's drama, crying, dying and all the crap. And I wanted to make my story a little bit lighter. I wanted them to talk like normal people not to run away like in some kind of psycho-brassilian drama. The story will be longer, of that i can assure you, and there will be plenty of twists in the plot, ups and downs, but I also wanted them to stay confident about the feelings. And just to focus on developing their relationship instead of running away from each other.**

**And also, I know it was a great opportunity do write some lemon, but be patient guys. I ultimately decided there will be one, but not just yet. I imagine you wouldn't just jump into someone's bed on the first date so why should Byakuya and Rukia do so? Right?**

**Anyway, reviews are always great, I know I can always count on you, so don't dosappoint me this time. It's not only for my guilty pleasure, but also to know what do you think about my story.**

**sai**


	7. Rangiku

**so... the next chapter. i'm soooooo sorry for this late update. i really tried, i wanted to do it sooner, however i failed due to many, many things that happened. also, i got a little bit lazy. i guess that's the core of the problem after all. but i felt so guilty, that now here it is. so enjoy this new chapter ;)**

* * *

She woke up feeling sun on her cheeks. Was it morning already? Rukia slowly opened her eyes. A warm feeling running all over her body. God, she never slept that good for decades. She took a look on a clock and realized that it was already 11 am. It was very, very late! She wanted to jump out of her futon, but something held her tight enough to stop. _What the..._ she instanty froze. A pair of arms were holding her in a grip. Then she realized it was Byakuya. Yes, he was sleeping with her the entire night. _Oh, it's only him... wait, what?!_ Her mind was desperately trying to give a good explanation. Then Rukia remembered last night and her eyes widen in shock. Was it really happening what she thought was happening? They kissed at the party, then they kissed in the garden and then... then they were sleeping in her bedroom, on her futon – TOGETHER? Firstly, she thought she was still asleep and all those things were just a dream, but suddenly _her_ dream began to move, still holding her tightly. Well, apperantly it wasn't just a dream. It seemed that he was, indeed, sleeping next to her.

_What does it all mean?_ She began to wonder. Maybe he was drunk and now he wouldn't even remember. But, he wasn't drinking at all. He kissed her. On purpose. Twice. Rukia shock her head. Nah, he couldn't just kiss her. As she began to think it was a dream after all, Byakuya kissed her cheek.

"Good morning." He said.

"Good morning, Nii-s..." now hold on! How was she supposed to call him brother in those peculiar circumstances? He was lying beside her the entire night, not to mention all those kisses before.

"I believe I told you not to adress me this way anymore."

"Yes, of course, B... mpfff..." she tried really hard to say _Byakuya_ but the word stuck somewhere deep in her throat.

"I'm sorry?" he asked her with a slight amusement.

"Bya... mn..." no name again. _Oh god, now he's thinking he was kissing a complete idiot. And apparently he was._

"Rukia, you remember my name, don't you?" he was teasing her.

"Yes, of course... I just..."

"Now, shall I remind you how to spell it?"

Before she had any chance to answer, he kissed her passionately, washing away all her doubts about what really happened the other night. Now, it was clear and obvious, she wasn't dreaming.

"Byakuya..." she whispered, holding his head and pulling it closer.

He pulled himself back, with the most adorable smile. She opened her eyes and instantly blushed. Her heart was racing in her chest, and she thought she was going to faint. He was definitely too addictive. And every kiss from him was like a desperate call for more.

"I didn't know I have to use such encouragements for you only to say my name."

She rose her eyebrow. Now, he was teasing her too much. Maybe she was a little bit timid, but considering this sudden change in their relationship, she could be quite shy!

"You're teasing me."

"I would never do such thing."

"I'm not so sure anymore…" she stated.

That was indeed, a little bit different from things she was used to be. She could actually tell, he had some sense of humor. However ridiculous it could sound, he really was making jokes. And that was a day, Rukia would remember till the end. She was actually having fun with Byakuya. And also, she felt pleasure she was never aware there could be such. Her heart was beating fast almost every time when he was near, but also it felt very natural.

* * *

Days were passing quickly and although the great party was still bring up in conversations, everything came back to normal. Seireitei was once again the capitol of peace and calmness. As for Rukia, those days were like a dream come true. Though there was still a lot of paperwork and other duties in her Squad, all she could think of was Byakuya. She rushed home almost every day, refusing sake with Renji or shopping with Matsumoto. She always came up with different excuses mainly because she didn't want to share her secret yet. However, it was becoming clear with each day, that something was happening. She was a little bit distracted, began daydreaming and as soon as the work was over, she ran back home not even looking back once. Even if Byakuya wasn't home, waiting for him at their manor was a sweet torture.

As for Byakuya, he also was out of his place. Maybe nothing that noticeable, but Renji could tell, something was different with his Captain. Sure he was still cold and impassive, but he wasn't paying that much attention to Renji's paperwork. The most shocking moment came, when the red-headed Shinigami overslept his lunch time under the tree, and horrified came back to the office, waiting for Byakuya to get angry – and his Captain didn't even notice he was late! Now, that was too much out of the ordinary.

But Byakuya's mind was often somewhere else. He was thinking what it was, what he had with Rukia. Was it good or maybe not? Sure he felt good about it as his dreams finally came true, however he wasn't so sure Rukia shared his feelings. However she never looked so peaceful and… happy. Could it be she was actually enjoying their little relationship? And if yes, then what next? Should they make another move? Oh, there were too many questions, but somehow Byakuya wasn't so sure about asking Rukia. He was hoping that she shared his feelings, but they rarely talked about their relationship. Mainly, they were just enjoying their time together. Small talks about likes and dislikes, but nothing serious. Was it the high time to talk it over? But then again, what was this feeling he had? Too soon to call it love, however also too late for a simple crush. Byakuya was a man of honor, and if he was to confess any feelings, he had to be sure. And it was just too early for love. And what would Rukia say if he would tell her he was in love? Would she take him serious? _Not yet. Let's just wait._ If he was to make it right, both of them should be sure. And until then, he would take it slow and let the things happen naturally.

* * *

Week from the party, Byakuya and Rukia were sitting in the dining room. The dinner was half eaten, but they were enjoying each other's company. Even the silence was somehow different and sweeter. She looked at him, from time to time as if waiting. And she was, indeed. She wanted to talk to Byakuya about what they had, however still she wasn't sure how to do it, so instead she was waiting for him to surmise and start the conversation. Unfortunately for her, he didn't.

"Byakuya…" she started.

"Yes?"

"I was thinking…" _about us_. She wanted to say it, but gave up the last moment.

"About?" he turned his head and looked at Rukia questioningly.

"Well, about…" she hesitated for a moment. "I was thinking that tomorrow we both have a free day…" she ended and looked down.

"I already thought about it." He just said and turned his head back to the plate.

"Oh?"

"Yes, I thought it would be the best if we-"

He stopped as the Hell Butterfly arrived. Byakuya listened to the information and immediately rose from his seat.

"I guess it will have to wait."

"What? What is it?"

"I have to go, but I'll be back as soon as possible." He gave Rukia a kiss on a forehead and left the room.

And she was all alone in just one second. Rukia didn't know if he would be home fast or not so there was no reason to just sit and wait. She left the dining room and made her way to the bedroom.

As she was in her room, all the memories from the past few days came back. She felt a warm and sweet feeling floating in her body. They kissed every night since the party. And with every kiss they wanted more. Both their bodies craving for fulfillment, like there was nothing else on the world to long for. He slept by her side twice and those were the most magical nights she had ever experienced. But now, she was there, all alone, without him. And there was a piece inside of her, dying slowly, as if sakura blossom scent was the oxygen. Rukia sat on her chair, looking sadly at her futon. There was something… blue color, deep down, on the bottom of her heart, whether she wanted it or not. _I miss him._ That was the truth, she was missing him already though he was absent for only an hour. She sighed heavily and went to change her clothes. That night would be lonely, as hell.

Rukia was lying on the futon, but she just couldn't fall asleep. Now, that she was alone, strange thoughts began to occupy her mind. She was happy, probably like never before, however… _yes, however…_ she still couldn't tell what Byakuya was thinking. Was he happy like she was? In love maybe? The problem with him was that his face still rarely changed, for most of the time it was expressionless as always. Of course, now he smiled from time to time, he was even making jokes, but still Rukia just couldn't read him. And that bothered her the most. Because her feelings were getting clearer every day and he was still a mystery. And he never said a word about them. _What else is there?_ As Rukia was lying, she began to wonder that maybe there was nothing more. Maybe Byakuya was just having good time and that was all. No love, no longing. And that he would eventually end it, just like that. Suddenly, she thought that _eternity is maybe something that does not exist…_

* * *

After sleepless night, Rukia decided that she had to do something about the whole situation. _but how to do it?_ She could use some friend, but who? Renji would instantly drop dead as soon as she would tell him the news. She could almost imagine his face, mouth opened in shock. And then his loud shouts. Or worse, he wouldn't say nothing at all. Just stare at her like she would be some kind of freak. No, Renji wouldn't understand and even if he would, probably Byakuya wouldn't be so content about it. Ichigo was already back in the living world and also his reaction would be probably quite similar to Renji's. Maybe Orihime? But she was in the living world too. Matsumoto…? _No way!_ But then Rukia thought, that maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. Though Matsumoto was definitely acting like an idiot for most days, Rukia knew she was also very understanding and much more experienced with men. And for sure Matsumoto wouldn't contempt her about their little affair. So maybe it wasn't that bad at all to tell her. Rukia sighed heavily and decided. _Matsumoto it is._

When the lunch time came, Rukia made her way to the 10th Squad barracks. Heavily-hearted, she stepped into Vice-Captain office. And to her surprise, she found Matsumoto working on her papers. Now, since when Matsumoto was actually working? That view shocked Rukia so much that for a second, she actually forgot why she came there after all.

"Kuchiki, what are you doin here?" cheerful voice sounded, bringing back Rukia from her shock.

"Oh, Rangiku-san, you're working. I didn't want to disturb!"

"Don't be silly honey. I'm just pretending! My Taichou is somewhere near."

"That's more like you. At first I thought I stepped in the wrong office…"

"Of course not! I'm doing my best here to make it look that way."

"Oh, I see…"

"So why are you here anyway? Don't tell me you brought some papers…"

"No, actually I thought maybe we could have a lunch together."

"I can't. I still have to pretend for an hour since I was late today."

"Oh, that's ok. Another time then." Rukia smiled sadly and was about to leave, but Matsumoto caught her sadness.

"Wait, Rukia!"

"Yes?"

"You didn't want to take me for a lunch, did you?" Matsumoto asked suspiciously.

"Well, actually, I wanted to talk over some issues with you…"

"So, what's the problem?"

"But not here, it's actually a private matter. I don't want anybody to hear."

"Is it a boyfriend issue?!" Matsumoto was all excited.

"Kinda… I guess." Rukia was already blushing.

"Then let me just grab some sake and we can go!"

"But what about your little pretending? Hitsugaya-Taichou wouldn't mind?"

"Forget him! My friend has a boyfriend issue. That's much more important!" Matsumoto was already preparing few sake bottles.

"Rangiku-san, but no sake today."

Matsumoto instantly stopped and gave Rukia a serious look.

"Is that so? Ok, so let's go."

They left for the lunch. On their way, Matsumoto almost bumped into Hitsugaya who was about to shout, but Rukia rescued her friend, stating that there was something important that needed to be discussed, especially with Matsumoto. Silver-haired Captain agreed for Matsumoto to go, believing that Rukia was too serious and unlike his Vice-Captain, wouldn't just look for excuse to drink sake. The girls sat under one of their favorite tree and Rukia was gathering her strength to confess about her relationship. But before she was able to say anything, Matsumoto spoke first.

"Is this about Kuchiki-Taichou?" Matsumoto was reading Rukia's mind.

"Well, actually, it is."

"So, tell me what's the problem."

"I think I'm dating him."

"Dating? Like what exactly do you mean by dating?"

"Oh, well… you remember the party, right? We kissed in the garden. And then in the manor as well."

"So, is he a good kisser?!" Matsumoto got her usual excited, cheerful face.

"Uhm, we… I guess."

"Oh I bet he is! I definitely wouldn't mind him kissing me."

"Rangiku-san!" Rukia was a little bit frustrated.

"I know, I know. He's all yours. I just wanted to know how is it to actually kiss him."

"It's damn good. Mind-blowing!" Rukia was a bit angry. After all, Byakuya was hers.

_Hers…_

"Now that's the spirit Rukia! And how's sex?!"

"There… we didn't get to that point, yet." Rukia was blushing. _Yet?! Girl, what are you thinking about? I'm such a pervert sometimes._

"Oh, there's still some time for that so don't worry."

"I'm not worrying about that!"

"So what's the problem then?"

"Well… it's all fantastic and oh so sweet, but I actually don't know what is it, that we've got."

"And what did he say about it?"

"Nothing. We didn't really discuss it. And I honestly don't know what he's thinking."

"Then go and talk to him. I don't see any problem here."

"Yeah but…" Rukia stopped. Maybe talking to Byakuya was her best option, but she still had some doubts. "What if he…"

"If he'll reject you? If he doesn't feel the same way?"

"yep, pretty much." That was the core of the problem. Rukia feared that he wouldn't share her feelings.

"Then at least you'll know." Matsumoto was finally serious. "Let me tell you something…"

"Yes?"

"You know, there isn't a day when I wouldn't be thinking what would've happened if I were honest just once with him."

Rukia knew Matsumoto was referring to Ichimaru Gin. He was Rangiku's best friend from the childhood and also a lost lover.

"I always thought he knew my feelings. I was sure I didn't have to tell him, because he was aware of my love. But I guess he wasn't, after all. Because if I had told him that, maybe he would know that I didn't need any revenge. That I was fine. And maybe that stupid idea to kill Aizen wouldn't ever appear in his dumb head. I seriously hate him for that. For leaving me. But most of all, I hate myself for not telling him what I felt. Maybe he would be still here, alive. But I never found any courage to tell him that. I just always assumed he already knew. And that was my biggest mistake."

A single tear dropped on the ground.

"Rangiku…"

"Let me finish Rukia." Matsumoto looked Rukia right in the eyes.

"The truth is, whatever you feel, you have to tell him. Because if there's even the slightest chance he feels the same way, you'll both be happy. And if he doesn't… then at least you'll know. Knowing is better than wondering, honey. And even the biggest failure, even the worst, beats the hell out of never trying."

"Yes, but…"

"No, no but's girl. I'm telling you, do it. Don't make my mistake. Fuck the consequences, fuck the implications of the actions, to hell with it all... whatever happens as a result is far, far better than the nothingness that is inevitable with silence. Your silence might protect you, but in the long run, it's the loudness that is remembered."

"Rangiku…"

"Honey, don't let your life happen to you. Nothing miraculous or heart-shaking is going to happen today that didn't happen yesterday if you don't DO something about it."

"Thank you, Rangiku."

Matsumoto smiled and gave a cheerful smile to Rukia.

"I'll go then. I think I have to talk to him."

"That's my girl! Oh and don't forget to tell me the details!" Matsumoto winked at Rukia. Then the black-haired Shinigami walked away, heading her manor.

Matsumoto looked at the sky and sighed. Another single drop made its way to her jaw.

"Oh Gin… I miss you."

* * *

**oh well, i felt so sorry for Rangiku. i actually was very sad when she was crying her heart out over Gin's death. and i thought that those would be the words that Matsumoto would tell about him.**

**anyway, i hope you all enjoyed this 7th chapter. and i promise to do the updates more frequent from now on. and of course, i would appreciate any reviews. it's always nice to know what you think about the story, guys. so make me happy and write something, please ;)**

**sai**


	8. Break up, break down

**geez, I know, A LATE UPDATE again. but believe me, this time it wasn't just about being lazy. I just had to be sure the story was going in the best direction I could ever imagine. So it took me some extra days to write it.**

**Oh, and there will be some heartbreaking scenes, so don't kill me, maybe? **

* * *

Rukia was running like hell. She finally understood what Matsumoto meant. She didn't want to wonder whether he loved her or not and what it was what they had. She had to know. And even if he didn't – well, even then, she had to be sure. All those years… silence almost killed them. They were passing each other like strangers. And maybe all those feeling were right there, from the very beginning and that silent treatment almost killed it. But Rukia was about to break it, once for all. And for the first time, just speak the truth. Because that might be the thing that could save them.

When Rukia was running, suddenly she felt someone's presence. It was familiar, yet she couldn't say whose was it. She stopped for a second. Yes, there was definitely someone. But who could it be? When she was about to ignore it, rasping voice spoke.

"Rukia-san."

"Who is it?" Rukia didn't know who was it, but she was sure, she knew the voice very well.

A tall, female figure appeared. Rukia knew her face. It was one of the Kuchiki Elders, Yuna. What was she doing here? The little Shinigami always appreciated that she had so little to do with Elders, as she was sure, they never fully accepted her. And what was more strange about that meeting was that the Elders would never meet with her alone, especially not in one of the alleys. What was it all about?

"I know where you are heading, but you cannot." Yuna said.

"I'm sorry, Yuna-sama?"

"Don't make me repeat it. You cannot go to him. Not now nor ever."

Rukia froze. Was it that the old woman knew about them? No, it couldn't be. Whatever they did, they were always in the manor and Byakuya would surely notice that they weren't alone.

"Now you must probably wondering how did I know."

"But… I'm not doing anything wrong." Rukia said slowly, not really sure about her answer.

"On the contrary, what you are doing to him is fully wrong."

Rukia's eyes widen in shock. What she was doing to him? But… she was sure no harm was done.

"What are you talking about, Yuna-sama?"

"Don't play dumb girl. Whatever tricks you used on him, you must stop. I am entirely sure that he succumb to you because you look exactly like your sister. And even if that's not the case, you can only destroy him, nothing more."

"Me? Destroying him? But how?"

"If you don't stop this relationship, I'll make sure that it won't last as a secret. Everybody will know and he'll be finished. As a Kuchiki Leader and as a Shinigami. And this all because of you."

"Don't try to blackmail me, Yuna-sama. I'll tell him everything!"

"But you won't. Because if you do, then the secret goes out as well. He can't be with you. And you have to end it tonight, otherwise tomorrow's news in Soul Society will be all about this dirty little secret of yours."

"How could you? Why are you doing this?!"

"Because there is someone for him, way better than you. And she will provide him a heir. And you are a disgrace to him. So what's your decision?"

"No way I'm going to do this! And I'm sure he won't accept it as well!"

"Are you? Are you really so certain he feels the same way? And even if, are you sure he will choose you over his family? You can't be that stupid. You are willing to take it all away from him?"

"I…" tears began to slowly run from her eyes.

"I'll say it again. If you don't end it now, he will be finished. And you as well."

"You… I have to…" Rukia couldn't really say anything.

"So what are you going to do?"

"I'll finish this… but I have to talk to him first."

"Fine. But you cannot tell him about this conversation." Yuna turned her back and quickly left, leaving Rukia all alone.

* * *

What was she supposed to do? The first minute she was happy, ready to tell Byakuya that she loves him and the next, her whole heart was devastated. Was it really over? She knew she couldn't take it all from him. He broke the rules for her, he saved her life so many times. He was always there for her, even ready to die. But this time, she had to be the one to save him. Rukia always knew that the family meant everything to him. And disgracing the Kuchiki family by her foolish actions would be something he just could not bear. _It would surely kill him._ And though her heart was breaking in pieces, overflowing her with sadness, it was the best she could do. Meet him and tell him it was finished. All.

Because maybe it never even started. Maybe she really used his weakness. And she would make a fool of herself even considering that he felt something for her. _How foolish of you, Rukia_. She couldn't stop tears from running. And even if he felt something for her… then she had to break him as well. But for his own good. There was nothing else. It was wrong from the very beginning, it just couldn't lead to anything good. And now the price for letting those emotions come out was so high. Why suddenly it was so hard to let go? The answer came quickly to her mind. _Because I love him_. It was so clear and obvious, all of a sudden. She loved him, to the bottom of her heart and what she was about to do, was killing her. She never felt the same for anyone in her entire life. She never really knew such feelings existed until now, when she was to let them go. Tears burnt her checks.

Suddenly, the Hell Butterfly flew over her, passing a message. Rukia closed her eyes and sighed heavily. She wiped away her tears and began to slowly walk towards the Kuchiki manor. There was only one thing she had to do and perhaps it was the hardest task to do. She was sure that her heart stopped beating the moment she agreed to let him go and that it would never start beating again.

* * *

Byakuya was giving his last orders to his squad after the long and exhausting battle with hollows. He was a little upset when his Division was chosen for that task. He was planning nice and romantic day with Rukia. He even thought it would be a good moment to tell her what she meant to him. He smiled to himself. She was sure occupying his mind the whole day. He didn't want to scare her, but he didn't want to left it unsaid either. It took him many years to finally admit his feelings for her to himself and though there was no reason to rush anything, he really wanted to make it right. Because she surely deserved the truth.

As he was on his way back home, he began to wonder how she could react to his sudden confession. He had to admit, he was a bit scared she wouldn't share his feelings. However it was even better to clear things before they've gone too far. As for him, he was sure what he felt. It was obvious from the very beginning. Of course not to him. But when he saw her disappointed smile at the breakfast, it affected him heavily. And he knew that he wouldn't feel that way unless he didn't love her. _Love her… Love Rukia._ For a long time, Byakuya was sure that that kind of feeling was reserved only for Hisana. And that he was lucky enough to feel it just once because it was a rare emotion in his family. However over those 50 years with Rukia as his adopted sister, some secret and well hidden force pushed him towards her. Firstly, he thought it was a right thing to do, to protect her and somehow care about her. But slowly, he began to realize it was something more. It wasn't only fulfilling his wife's last wish, it was a need that grew inside of him, despite her wish. And he really tried to silence those feelings, however they were too strong, even for him. And after some time, they began to slowly surpass him, becoming almost impossible to control.

When Byakuya was deeply daydreaming about his relationship, Renji came.

"Uhm, Taichou?"

"Abarai."

"We killed all the Hollows and I was thinking that maybe it's enough for today?" Renji asked shyly, praying that he wouldn't have to do his paperwork.

"You mean you want to get out of the paperwork, I assume?"

"Well… you can put it that way Taichou." Renji gulped.

"Very well then. You are free today."

"Seriously?!" The red-haired Shinigami thought he overheard.

"I do not have a habit of repeating myself."

"You don't have to tell me twice Taichou. I'm going then!" And Renji ran away, fearing that even if his Captain usually didn't change his mind, it was better to seize opportunity as fast as he could.

Byakuya smiled to himself. He was always very harsh for Renji, mainly because of his carefree behavior and sloppy paperwork, however he knew that Renji was probably one of the few people he could rely on. And of course, he was a dear friend of Rukia and if he was to be with her for real, he had to become more understanding then before. Even if for Renji.

The 6th Squad Captain realized that it was indeed the best time to get back home, prepare something special before Rukia's arrival. He decided that sending the Hell Butterfly would be the best option to make sure she would be home for time.

_Rukia. Come to the garden when the sun sets. There is something I need to tell you. B._

* * *

All she could feel was emptiness. Like some essential part of her was rip out. She couldn't feel anything and even her eyes seemed to be empty as well. As Rukia was slowly entering the manor, every step was like a torture. He would be hers only for just few minutes and then he would be gone forever. However she thought her reasoning was noble, that feeling of despair was something she just couldn't get shed. Just few more steps and it would be all gone. _I can do this. I have to._ She slowly entered the garden.

And there he was, standing in the circle of small candles, waiting. He looked so charming, so ethereal, almost like a ghost. Rukia looked at him and was about to burst into cry again. How could she just let go? There he was, standing, her dream, her longings, all of her desires, even those hidden. And she was about to throw it all away. But it had to be done, even if it would leave her broken hearted and devastated. She was doing it for him. _I love you, but you'll never know._ She approached him.

"Rukia." Het shunpoed near her and wanted to kiss her, but she pulled back.

"Nii-sama." She said coldly, doing her best not to cry.

"What happened?" he asked shocked. He knew something was definitely wrong.

"You wanted to talk to me, however there is something I have to tell you too."

"And what is that?"

"This thing, between us, I think it's better to end it now."

"I'm sorry?" he made few steps backward, still in disbelief.

"I can't do this anymore. I don't feel anything for you and I don't want for it to continue."

You feel nothing for me? I don't believe you." Then he made some steps forward, approaching her very closely.

"I'm sorry Nii-sama, but this is the truth."

"Stop calling me that. And I don't believe you. Are those kisses are nothing for you?" he asked her and gently kissed her lips, but she remained unaffected on the outside. However inside, she was breaking apart.

"Stop it, please…"

"Then tell me if they are nothing for you."

"They are. I feel nothing. I'm sorry Nii-sama. But I would want things to just get back to normal. I'm sorry I misled you with my actions. But I'm sure you will appreciate it after some time."

"Rukia, what are you telling me? If you don't feel anything for me, then why did you act otherwise?" his eyes were full of sadness and anger.

"I thought I could do this for you, but I didn't. I'm deeply sorry Nii-sama."

"I thought I told you to never call me that again!" for the first time he raised his voice and Rukia was a little bit shocked.

So there she was standing, breaking his heart. She realized that indeed, she was crushing him. _Even if you won't be even capable of forgiving me I still have to do this, Byakuya._

"Again, I deeply apologize for my actions. I will take any punishment for my behavior."

Suddenly, his gaze softened. And after a second, his eyes were empty as well. A sign of despair and grief showed up on his face, then it came back to being expressionless as always.

"I guess, until this very moment I never realized how hard it was to lose something you never had."

She blinked her eyes twice, trying very hard to stop tears from running. She had to be strong, but his words were hurting her already broken heart. He would never forgive her. He was always keeping himself hidden for others, protecting his true feeling from coming out. And after all those years, when he finally gave it a try, to be happy again, she had to break him. Not only he would never forgive her, for sure he would hate her as well. She was hating herself already.

"I'm sorr-"

"Stop it. Stop apologizing. There will be no punishment, nothing. I will do what you asked me to. Things will get back to normal. This – never happened. You can go back to your room, because there is nothing else to say. Whatever happened is over. It's so over."

He looked at her for the last time and Rukia was sure – she wouldn't be able to look upon herself in the mirror ever again. She was telling herself it was the best for him, but the truth was that it finished him as well.

Byakuya shunpoed to his bedroom, leaving Rukia in the garden. His world was crushed, devastated and his heart broken in pieces. All his dreams, his hopes were dead, as he was dead too. Whatever was about to happen, he didn't care anymore. If the woman he loved so much was despising him and his feelings, then there was nothing more for him anymore. How could he be so wrong? Of course, he provide for her not love him like he did love her, but that?! She felt nothing from the start. And she did it only because she thought he exacted it from her. It was a horror. Byakuya, the prince of silence, was shattered in pieces. He felt some kind of lost inside, however he laughed bitterly to himself over that feeling. How could he possibly lost something that wasn't his?

Rukia remained in his garden. She couldn't move. Her whole body was trembling. She lost probably the most precious and exceptional thing that ever happened to her. She lost the man of her dreams, the love of her life and the only person she truly cared about from the bottom of her heart. A single tear run through her cheek. And then another. She kneeled and hid her face in her hands. He began to sob quietly. _Byakuya… if only…_ yes, if only. Those were probably the most saddest two words in the whole world. But the world didn't exist anymore. And nothing did. At that time, her whole world just collapsed, as she made them both miserable in one night.

* * *

Two silhouettes met outside the manor. They were whispering vividly about something.

"It's all done my lady."

"Is it really? Did she break up with him?"

"Of course Yuna-sama, everything according to your plan."

"That's good. Keep an eye on her, though. She could change her mind."

"I don't think she would my lady."

"Nevertheless, I prefer to control it. Especially if I have you inside the manor."

"Of course, I'm at your service."

"Now, we have to wait for a while before meeting my daughter and Byakuya-sama. Make sure Rukia will stay away from him."

"Of course my lady."

The taller figure disappeared into the night as the other one went back to the manor. But nobody noticed it as the only two people no longer were paying their attention to anything.

* * *

**I know, I know. Pretty lame, I'm sure. But there had to be some twist, only to make it better, you know? And I promise, I will make it up to you all. And also I'm very sorry if this chapter was a bit shorter, but I did my best, really.**

**sai**


	9. What do you feel?

**ok guys. so this chapter is going to be a little sad and twisted and maybe Byakuya is a little bit OOC, however... Well, anyway, I made this one a little longer and I hope you'll find it interesting.**

* * *

_My world fell into pieces. I'm speechless. Another day passed and I haven't seen you. I can't see your smile anymore nor I can feel your presence. It's dark in here, only emptiness is surrounding me. You told me you don't love me and you walked away. How am I supposed to feel? You were a spark in my heart, a warm touch around my body. You were my everything. But I don't feel you anymore. I know you've been avoiding me and I guess that's better. but I can still feel your scent. And God… I miss the way you smell._

_It has been days… or maybe decades? I don't know. It seems that the time has been stopped. And I feel like I'm dying. You're trying so hard not to meet me, but you failed yesterday. You were so surprised. But also so distant and cold. And you expect me to behave like it never happened. Like I never kissed you or touch you. Like I never loved you. And I'm trying, I really am. Yet still I look at you and I fall to pieces. I am lost in you. I gave you my heart, but you ripped it. And now I'm completely empty. If I could feel you again, just once. For one more time just touch your soft skin, feel its warmth, see your beautiful violet eyes. And I know I can't. You made me incomplete._

_What's the purpose of love if it only leaves you broken and restless. I've never been this lonely before. I was alone for all those years, but never lonely. I thought that watching over you would be enough for my heart. Knowing that you're safe, would ease my feelings. But now that I know the taste of your lips, the softness of your touch – I know that nothing would fill the gap in my heart. It's like I'm missing some exceptional piece in shape of your heart and only you can complete it. And I cannot make myself stop loving you, even if it hurts so much. All I have is my memory. And now I shall hold it, kiss it, love it. Because even if my life ends, my love for you surely won't._

_But most of all, I cannot forgive myself for hurting you too. I never expected you to return my feelings. I thought you felt them too. But I was blind. You were only afraid to let me down. To refuse me, to live like you wanted to, not upon my expectations. And I hate myself for that pain I caused. I never meant to do that. I foolishly assumed you could love me too. I hoped so much for you to be mine that I failed to see your true feelings. That you have your own life and that it doesn't mean I am someone special to you. You don't owe me anything but I thought you knew that. But it seems that the only thing you feel for me is fear. And that's what kills me the most._

* * *

_I always knew looking back on my tears would make me laugh, but I never knew looking back on my laughter would make me cry. Oh Byakuya, I miss you. When you smiled you had my undivided attention. When you laughed you had my urge to laugh with you. When you cried you had my urge to hold you. When you said you loved me, you had my heart forever. A part of you has grown in me. And we are always together, never apart, maybe we are in distance, but never in my heart. There you're always with me, holding mi tightly, embracing my dreams, breathing the same moment, kissing away my fears and changing them into hopes. And even if we were never meant to be, you will be always mine and I shall remain yours. But now I have to let you go, for your own good. I'm going to smile and make you think I'm happy, I'm going to laugh, so you don't see me cry, I'm going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me - I'm going to smile. I sense a certain something that, in my heart, felt so true that I knew I waited all my life to fall in love with you. But now you're gone, I have to step back._

_I don't know if it's good anymore. I was shocked. One day everything is in its place, like it has never been and the next, it all crashes down. What was I supposed to do? Fight for you? Never let you go? How selfish would I be? Maybe now you hate me, but in a long run, you'll be glad. I really hope you will. I really hope I chose right. You gave me everything. You gave me home, family, work. You protected me countless times. You were the only person who looked after me. I could always depend on you. You were even going to sacrifice your own life for me. How could I act otherwise then? I had to protect you, for the first time. It was my turn to sacrifice. And even if I won't be able to find my true happiness and love, it's ok with me, as long as you're safe. I can't let you protect me anymore. Because I love you, Kuchiki Byakuya._

* * *

Rukia was avoiding Byakuya for several days. And it was killing him. Deep down, he prayed for something to happen. Anything. He was hoping that instead of keeping being silent she would just pierce him with her sword. From the fatal night, she ate her breakfast before him and she was leaving the manor just as he was waking up. It was a pure torture. On the one hand, he was hoping to see her, but on the other, he felt relieved when she was gone. and nothing seemed to change until one day.

Byakuya was heading to the dining room when the Hell Butterfly arrived. The 6th Squad has been ordered to handle some hollow problem in the east Rukongai. Finally, something was happening, as he was occupied with Rukia for too long. He thought that coming back to his duties would ease his pain somehow. Only if for a while. He has been ordered to send few man from his Division, but decided to handle it himself. He rushed to his Squad, without breakfast.

When Byakuya arrived, Renji was already there. It would be some kind of surprise, if only Byakuya paid attention. He didn't even look at his Vice-Captain. He just looked outside the window and closed his eyes. Why was it so hard to focus?

"Taichou…" Renji said, trying to catch his Captain's attention.

"Yes?"

"You have to choose the men to handle the situation in Rukongai."

"I already did. I'm going alone."

"But… Taichou. It's just a minor problem. You don't have to trouble yourself over it."

"I need some practice, otherwise my skills will rust."

"Oh… then, can I go with you?"

"It will not be necessary."

"But I have to practice too, Taichou."

"Fine. Be ready in ten minutes."

Byakuya was ready for a fight. If Renji was true, it would only last few minutes. Not enough to keep his mind occupied on something else than Rukia. But he already decided. He sighed quietly and clenched his fists. Why was he suddenly so full of emotions he couldn't overcome? Nobody noticed the change, however inside he was shacking like a little boy. Why did it affect him so much that he just couldn't focus?

Byakuya and Renji arrived very quickly to the place the Hollows were last seen. They both focused to trace the evil reiatsu. After a while there was a noticeable trace. Byakuya decided they should split up in order to find the Hollows quickly, but the truth was he just wanted to get rid of Renji. Somehow he just couldn't look at him anymore, as he constantly reminded him of Rukia. And that was the last thing he wanted to think about.

He walked deep into the forest. The hollows were near, he could almost feel their smell. The scent of death and despair. Something moved slightly in the bushes and within a second Byakuya shunpoed left, cutting the first Hollow in half. Next moment another appeared and a loud roar could be heard. And then another. Four Hollows appeared but Byakuya stayed unaffected. Just few seconds passed and they were also gone. but then another wild voice sounded, much more stronger than before. That Hollow was much bigger and stronger. Byakuya released his Shikai.

"Chire, Senbonzakura."

In a second cherry petals were flying in the air. The Hollow rushed towards Byakuya. His long arms trying to stab the black-haired Shinigami. However Byakuya dodged the attack as Senbonzakura's petals protected him. And then something unexpected happened. Just as Byakuya shunpoed next to the Hollow to make the final cut – he stopped.

_What's the point of it, at all? If I just stop… stop fighting. Would the pain stop as well? Just for a second, becoming vulnerable. Focusing on the pain. The only thing that's real._

The Hollow didn't wait long. As soon as Byakuya's Zanpakutou got back to its primal form, he stabbed the 6th Squad Captain in the arm. Then another stab and another. In the arm, stomach, leg. Blood was everywhere, as another pierce tore his flesh. Byakuya fell to the ground, waiting for the fatal blow to come.

_Is this how it ends? Is this how death looks? Just few seconds and it's over. So over…_

"_I can't do this anymore. I don't feel anything for you and I don't want for it to continue."_

_This… love._

_Rukia…_

_It's over._

But the final blow never came. Byakuya was sure he heard some voice calling him, but he was losing too much blood very fast. He thought he would feel some pain but instead he felt more numb than before. Someone was calling him. Who could it be? _Is this you, Rukia?_ He didn't know as the darkness covered his eyes.

"Taichou, Taichou!" Renji was shouting after he killed the Hollow.

* * *

Rukia was in the 13th Squad barrack, doing her paperwork. She couldn't focus. She was still more occupied with Byakuya than her work. How was she supposed to live under his roof again? She thought that maybe it was the best time to move out. For some time maybe, or permanently. She just couldn't avoid him for the rest of her days. All those days were exhausting. Waking up so early it was still dark outside. Eating breakfast as fast as she could then rushing to her Division. And it was more than sure that she would bump into him eventually. Unfortunately the Kuchiki manor wasn't big enough for her to hide forever. And she just couldn't look at him. The pain flowing from his eyes, the sadness painted all over his face, even though it supposed to be impassive as always. It was too much for her. She loved him too much to see him suffer every day. And maybe it would be better for him to just disappear.

Suddenly, Rukia felt a strange thing. There was something wrong, but what was it? She could swear it was Byakuya's reiatsu. But why could she feel it? He was masking it every day. And what's more, why was it so strange? So wounded?

Before she could answer her questions, Renji ran into her office, gasping heavily.

"Rukia, you have to go!"

"What? What is it?!"

"Don't you feel it? It's Taichou… he's wounded, very bad."

Rukia rose from her sit immediately. The shock hit her heavily. What was Renji saying? That Byakuya was wounded? How could it happen?

"What happened?!"

"We were after some Hollows in Rukongai. Taichou said that we should split up. And as I was finishing some Hollows I found, I felt that he was wounded so I rushed to help him."

"To help him? How could it be?!"

"Rukia, now is not the time. I'll tell you everything but now you really have to go. He's in the 4th Squad barracks."

They both shunpoed to 4th Division barracks. Rukia felt unpleasant shivers running down her spine, but for that moment it he was more important than anything. She didn't care about any blackmails or anything at all. All she could think about was Byakuya and his life. She had to see him, to be sure if he was ok.

"Rukia-san." A female voice dragged Rukia out of her thoughts.

"Unohana-Taichou. How is Nii-sama?" Rukia was very concerned.

"His wounds are deep, but he remains conscious now."

"That's good. Will he be ok?"

"I think I can manage to heal him. However…"

"What? What is it?"

"Your brother refuses any treatment. As long as he remains awake, we can't heal him as he won't let us come any closer."

"WHAT?! Why?!" Rukia was shocked. Byakuya was refusing treatment? Why the hell was he doing so?

"Calm down. I think you need to speak to him. I think it might be some kind of shock. If I haven't know Kuchiki-Taichou for years I would have said he lost the will of life. However I'm sure it's not the case."

"I… I should talk to him then." Rukia's eyes were full of tears. Was it possible that he really lost his will to fight?

"Yes, go to him, he's in that room." Unohana pointed the room and walked away.

Rukia slowly walked towards Byakuya's room and was about to step in, but then suddenly Renji grabbed her hand from the knob.

"Before you go Rukia, I have to tell you something."

"What is it Renji? I have to go to him."

"It sounds ridiculous and stupid but when I got to Taichou it looked like he…"

"Like what?!"

"I don't know. I was sure he released his Shikai, I could sense it before. But when I got there, his Zanpakutou was in its primal form. And it looked like Taichou was letting the Hollow stab him."

"Wh… I…" Rukia felt a twist in her stomach. She couldn't believe it could get worse. She was sure it was for his own good to lie to him, to let him go. But she never expected he could do such thing.

"Oh, forget it Rukia. I'm sure he fought, maybe that was some kind of spell or something. I don't know. Or maybe I've just seen wrong, you know?"

"Yeah… He wouldn't just let go, would he?"

"Of course, it was stupid of me to tell you such things. Just go to him now, don't let him waiting!"

Renji walked away and Rukia grabbed the knob again. She sighed heavily and stepped into the room. Byakuya was lying on the bed, covered with bandages. But the blood was still spilling from his wounds. He breathed heavily and she could feel his spiritual force leaking from him. He didn't say a word as she walked in, his head was turned away from the doors, his eyes set upon the window.

"Nii-sama…" she almost whispered the words.

Nothing. He didn't even flinch.

"Nii-sama, please. Talk to me." Rukia said louder, making few steps towards his bed.

"I believe I told you not to address me as your brother ever again." Finally his deep voice spoke. But there was something else in that voice. Some kind of pain and… surrender.

"Byakuya…" she never thought she would be able to speak his name ever again. However it was painful, some tenderness slipped from her words.

"What do you want Rukia?" he asked, still facing the window.

"I came to check on you. And they told me you're refusing treatment."

"That's not your concern."

"But it is! You have to let them heal you. Otherwise…"

"Otherwise what?" he finally turned his head to Rukia, but avoided looking into her eyes.

"I don't want anything to happen to you. Please, let them do their work."

"And why should I? Why do you even care?"

She looked at him. He was devastated. The blood trickled from his wounds, his bandages were already soaked. Rukia couldn't stand the view anymore. She didn't care what would happen next, the only thing that was important was to keep him safe.

She grabbed his hand and immediately felt his warmth. Oh God, how she missed it. A small gesture gave her shivers.

"Please, I do care. I don't want to lose you." She whispered to him.

"Don't pity me. I know you don't. you were very clear that night." He immediately pulled his hand back and looked away.

"We can't be together. But it doesn't mean that I don't care… you mean very much to me."

"So why did you lie that night? Telling me that you feel nothing for me?!"

"Because… because we just can't be together. We just can't."

"Is there someone else in your life?" he looked her deep into the eyes again.

"What? No! there's only you. It was always you."

"So why…?" he whispered.

"Because I can't be with you. Don't ask me why. There's nothing I want so much as to be with you. But we are not meant to be." She couldn't stop the tears from falling. She told him the truth, but it didn't ease his pain.

"Please Byakuya, let them treat you. Please do it for me."

"Those wounds are cureless."

"What? What are you talking about?" she looked at him concerned.

"Give me your hand." He draw his hand to her. She slowly placed her palm in his.

He placed her hand in the middle of his chest. She could feel his heart beating rapidly.

"What do you feel?" he asked with eyes shut.

"I… it's…" she didn't know what to say.

"It's my heart. And it's broken."

Another tear run through her checks. She looked at him again and their eyes met.

"Can you feel that?" he asked.

"I… I'm sorry." She began to cry and pulled her hand. She couldn't stand the look in his eyes. So much pain and despair.

"I'm so sorry." Rukia suddenly rose from her seat and ran away from his room.

She bumped into Renji and Unohana, but she couldn't say anything. She just ran. As fast as she could, heading nowhere. Tears running from her eyes. She felt hopeless and helpless.

_What have I done?!_

* * *

"Unohana-Taichou! You have to come!" a Shinigami from 4th Squad shouted.

"What is it?"

"It's Kuchiki-Taichou. He's unconscious again!"

"What are you waiting for then? Let's start the healing quickly."

* * *

**Well, what do you think? Was it too much? I know, I never thought Byakuya would be such a weakling. But it made a great opportunity for Rukia to reveal her feelings and we're heading somewhere guys! I mean, some big this will happen in next chapter. And you won't be disappointed, I promise.**

**sai**


	10. I will never let you go

**Hello there! I know, I know. It's been a while. But honestly, I didn't have much time. First, there was Wimbledon, then Stanford. Also I was exploring new TV series and in the same time killing mutants in _The last of Us_. So you see, I was busy as hell. But now, here you are. 10th chapter for you. and to ease your pain I also decided on my first lemon. so here you have it and I hope you'll like it. And even if you don't be gentle with me. I tried to do my best.**

**Anyway, enjoy ;)**

* * *

_Owner of a lonely heart much better than an owner of a broken heart._

_-YES, "Owner of a lonely heart"_

* * *

He was floating in a senseless space. He could feel nothing. Was it just a dream? Or maybe it was the end of it all? Byakuya felt like he was falling, deep into the dark. No pain, nothing. His body was light as a feather. He could hear some voice, but the words didn't make any sense. Was someone calling out for him? The voice was familiar, but… everything was blurry and each of his senses failed him deeply to recognize the place he was in or the voice that was calling him.

And what if it was all over? Maybe death finally got him. And if that was the case, was it good? His mind was spinning, it was difficult to think. She told him she had feelings for him. Was it true? Or maybe she just pitied him, seeing him all ripped out. But on the other hand, she could never keep the truth from him. He read from her like from an opened book. So when she was honest with him? That night in the garden? Or when she visited him in 4th Squad barracks? Too many questions and not a single answer. But if she was true about having feelings for him what was keeping her from him? _Oh, Rukia…_

Could he ever get to know?

As he was slowly drifting finally a sudden revelation came to him. It hit him like a lightening. Those words that his grandfather was always telling him when he was young. That a noble man, the Head of the Clan cannot run away from his problems. If there were some undefined matters that he should settle them. And Byakuya knew that he could not be turn away from it. And what scared him so much all of the sudden? A beautiful, petite girl? He fought against many monsters, Arrancars for the Love of God. And he was never scared, he never ran away. Why should he now? Deep down he was sure Rukia wasn't faking all those emotions. Maybe she was a bit afraid, well, he couldn't really blame her for that. But whatever kept her so well from him, whatever caused it, he had to know so he could solve the problem. How foolish it was to give up. Like a coward, because certainly not like a noble Shinigami. Now he knew what he should do. _And I swear, I will have my answers._

* * *

Rukia sighed with relief when Renji told her that Captain Unohana finally let Byakuya come back to his manor to fully recover. She was scared that he might not make it. And she would be the only one to blame. Up until that moment, she never knew about his feelings. Of course, he protected her countless times from danger, but she was sure it was out of his duty. After that… all those exceptional moments with him confused her a little, but still she was certain it wasn't love. But just as she touched his wounded chest to feel his heartbeat it all became clear that it definitely wasn't any duty or even a crush. He loved her. And when did it happen? And how? If someone told her that months before, she would just burst out laughing. But now… he really loved her. And he almost died because of it. How could she ever let it happen?

She didn't know what to do, but it was obvious that coming home wasn't an option. Maybe Byakuya could use some rest and well… just some time without her wandering around his beloved manor. Rukia decided that staying at her Division's barracks would be the best for them both. God knows, she needed some time alone too.

* * *

Byakuya was finally home, lying in his bedroom. Captain Unohana strongly suggested he should rest for a couple of days. And with her making strong suggestions, he knew going out was out of the question. And maybe it was even better that way, because he was hoping that here, in the manor, he could finally speak with Rukia. How little did he know about her plans.

Just before dinner, one of his servants knocked. Byakuya let him in and the man asked him if he would be able to eat in the dining room or if he wanted to have his mean in his room. At first, Byakuya was willing to eat outside, because it would mean he could meet Rukia.

"I think I'll eat in the dining room."

"Very well Master. And is six o'clock good?"

"I will come as soon as Rukia will be there too."

"Oh Master, but Rukia-san won't be there. She informed us she will be staying in her Division for a couple of days."

"And why is that?"

"She deeply apologized but she decided you could use some peace and quiet during your recovery Master."

"Is that so? Very well. I'll it here then."

The servant bowed to Byakuya and left his room instantly. _Is she still avoiding me?_ Byakuya was disappointed by this turn of events. He hoped for some time with her, to clarify the situation. And with her staying so far away it wasn't so easy. How was he supposed to talk with her, when he wasn't able to leave the manor? _Foolish girl, making my life so complicated._ Then he finally managed to find a solution. If she didn't want to talk to him, fine then. There was still one option left. Byakuya smiled to himself, but instantly changed his expression to cold one. And then he called for his servant again.

* * *

It was early evening when almost everyone left the 13th Division. The only one who stayed was Rukia. She tried to do some paperwork, but it was no use. The only thing she could focus on was him. Her Prince of Silence. If the situation wasn't so hopeless and dramatic, she would find it very amusing and funny, actually. Kuchiki Byakuya, falling in love with no one else than his helpless and clumsy sister. Sister-in-law to be precise. It would make a nice story for sure. People around would be shocked for months if they knew. Rukia smiled to herself._ Of all the man here, you fell in love with me._ She knew that Renji had a crush on her once, but it was ages before. And Ichigo was acting strangely at first, but then he realized he was into Orihime. And when Rukia was certain that it was just not for her to fall in love, to be in a relationship, her freaking brother decided to fall for her. _Yep, stupid._ Was it? Of course not. She admitted to herself some time ago that it was always him. Maybe she didn't know at first, but then it became clear that Byakuya was the one who stole her heart completely. But with his cold demeanor it was impossible to let those feelings bloom. _Stupid Byakuya, it was always all about you._

As she was so deep in her thoughts, someone knocked at the door. Who could it be at such hour? But after few seconds it wasn't a mystery anymore as the messenger came in with a letter. Rukia was curious what it could be as almost every Shinigami preferred Hell Butterflies. _A letter? For me?_ She didn't knew who on Earth could send her a letter and the curiosity won. She opened it and instantly froze. Then a single tear made its way down her cheek.

_And if my skin were glass my love_

_You would see a heart_

_that keeps on beating_

_Only in the hope that_

_you'll return, to me_

_B._

_PS. If it means anything to you, come back home. We need to talk._

He wanted to talk to her? After what she did to him? That couldn't be true… Rukia read the letter again and again. He still wanted to talk. She wasn't sure what to do. Her reason was telling her not to, because he would clearly be better of her, but her heart was whispering otherwise. And what was she supposed to do? She looked at the letter again. Those words… _return, to me._ Yes, to him. To Byakuya. And of course it meant something to her. Actually, it meant everything. He was always so taciturn when it came to express feelings. But now, all those words? And how the hell she was supposed to say no to it? To ignore that letter? Even if her mind was still constantly reminding her of that stupid blackmail that caused all that, she just couldn't reject it. Not when he wrote something like that. And before Rukia realized, she was already running towards the manor. To him. She didn't care anymore for there was a particular man waiting only for her.

* * *

Byakuya was sitting on his bed, wondering if Rukia had read his letter. He wanted to write so many things, but all of them just didn't seem right. He only wished that she had courage to come and talk to him. However as the minutes were passing, his hope was shrinking. He sighed with disappointment. _So apparently you're not coming after all._ Well, that could be predicted. What was he thinking anyway? That some foolish words would just convince her to come back? What a nonsense. _You're pathetic, Kuchiki Byakuya. Wining for her attention like some sort of beggar._ He gritted his teeth. But as soon as he gave up any hope, doors to his bedroom opened wide and a petite figure stepped in.

Rukia came in, but once she saw his surprised eyes, she stopped in the middle of his room. They stared at each other in silence. Was there anything to say? Byakuya wanted to say something, but for the first time in his life, he didn't find any right words. Suddenly, the whole situation became indescribable. He looked at her closely, like she was some kind of dream, that might fade away every second. But no, she was there, all true.

"Rukia." He finally spoke, not knowing what to say next.

"Don't." She flashstepped and put her finger on his lips. She lowered her gaze and sighed heavily. "Don't talk when all words ain't enough."

* * *

Rukia was defeated. Whatever plans she had made, trying to avoid him hardly, not to mention getting so close to him. But now she was defenseless. She couldn't take it anymore. So whatever happens next, it didn't matter anymore. She just couldn't fight any longer, especially when the man of her dreams, her only true love, put away his pride and begged her for love. She could take everything, but not that. However hard the consequences might be, she shall face them tomorrow. But not now. Now she was all his.

"What am I supposed to do then?" he asked her.

"Whatever you want Byakuya. I'm all yours." She rose her head and looked him in the eye.

Indeed, now that she said it, it seemed that all words were not enough. How could they ever be? Byakuya looked at her and it became obvious. He lowered his gaze to meet her violet eyes and they told him everything he needed to know. His big hands captured her small face and she closed her eyes, biting her lower lip. He was getting closer and closer and the moment seemed to be endless. How many seconds passed…? Maybe it was whole eternity. But finally his lips met hers in the softest kiss. Her whole body trembled in this unknown feeling. Rukia clenched her tiny hands on his haori, pulling him closer. Maybe the world wouldn't end tonight and they still would have to face the morning, but in that very moment it didn't matter at all.

He kissed her lips slowly, making it a pure torture for both of them. Inch by inch, discovering them like for the first time, like there was nothing else. Caressing her cheeks, he leisurely entered his tongue into her mouth and they entangled in a smooth dance. She pulled him even closer if that was possible. Feeling his warmness through the fabric of his clothes she laid her palms on his chest. He embraced her tightly and broke the kiss for both of them to breathe.

"Why now?" he asked.

"And why not?" she answered and pulled his head closer to her.

"Are you sure you want this?"

"I'm sure I want you."

Byakuya didn't need any more to know she was certain. He took her up right to his bed and laid her on the cold sheets. He looked at her one last time just to be sure of what would happen next. He had doubts about it. Not that he didn't want to do it, no. His body was already on fire and even if they only kissed it was very hard to control himself. But shouldn't they talk first? Settle their situation and all the problems? He wanted to stop and start some sort of conversation, but Rukia pulled him closer in an assuring gesture for him to continue. And at that moment, there was no way to retreat. His senses took over control and pure desire grew within them to the unstoppable point.

His kisses began to wander from her mouth through her neck down to her collarbone. Sweet moans escaping her throat were like fuel to fire his passion. She held him tightly as if any lighter grasp would make him disappear. Feeling those kisses all over her, she couldn't think of anything else. He was the only one, the only man who could make her want to scream from pleasure just by touching her briefly. Byakuya didn't want to rush anything, however it was clear they both needed more. With every second all those kisses became insufficient as their bodies clearly were craving for more. His hands slowly making their way to her obi sash. Rukia opened her eyes slightly to this sudden gesture. She has never been this close to anybody and though her body and mind were loudly screaming for more, sending shivers through her spine, she was still a bit afraid of what was about to happen. But as soon as her violet eyes met with his, full of love and passion, she was sure that no matter what would happen or how much it would hurt, that was exactly what she wanted.

Byakuya untied her obi sash in a blink of the eye and slowly moved his right hand under her yukata. A sudden rush of blood came to Rukia's cheeks immediately. He caressed her soft skin inch by inch, giving her undefined pleasure with this sublime touch. His hand wandering all over her body as if he tried to remember every part of her skin. Slowly, he uncovered her yukata and exposed top of her body. At first she tried to hide her naked breasts, ashamed that maybe he wouldn't appreciate the view, but he stopped her in a flash.

"Don't. You're beautiful." He reassured her in his low tone.

Leisurely, she let him touch her naked body. He began to kiss away all of her doubts, from her neck down to her belly. His finger marked a special path on her body, firing her already hot skin. Rukia felt her body melting with every touch. Was it a dream? If it was, then surely she wouldn't want to wake up. Confident enough, she moved her tiny hands under his yukata, what met with his surprise. But as soon as she felt the warmness of his skin, an unknown feeling overcame her mind. What was it, that she never felt it? She could feel something pushing her further into him. As if nothing was enough, making her want more and more. She untied his obi quickly and took of his yukata, leaving Byakuya chest bare. The view was indeed amazing. Even better than she even imagined. Sharp lines of muscles mixed with softness of his skin. She entangled her fingers into his silky hair and pulled him closer, to feel his warm, naked chest on hers. The feeling of two bodies so close to each other made them both shiver. Byakuya kissed her tenderly as she gave away another moan of pleasure.

Her body arched, giving him a clear message what she wanted. And there was no such thing he wouldn't give her. Another slow move of his hands made its way down to her hakama pants and pulling them down instantly. In less than one second, he left her completely naked underneath him. He stopped for a moment to enjoy the view beside him. Byakuya never even wondered how she would look without her Shinigami clothes. He wouldn't dare to. However finally seeing her that way his mind went into overdrive. He showered her small body with quick kisses and bite marks, making her more his, as if it was still possible. She moaned loudly, giving him a sign of pleasure that he was giving to her. Slowly, his kisses ran down her body, to a certain spot already craving for his attention.

Rukia's eyes shot open as she felt his lips dangerously getting closer to her most intimate part. What was about to happen?! _No, it couldn't be…_ But as soon as she felt his first kiss on her clit, her mind drifted elsewhere, leaving her only pure pleasure. His tongue slowly moving up and down, sending hot waves into her body.

"Bya… Byakuya…" she let a loud moan.

That made him even more insatiable than he already was. Feeling her hot and wet core, he pulled himself up, much to her disappointment. But as soon as he kissed her tenderly, she felt his finger thrusting into her, moving inside and providing another kind of delight. She laced her fingers in his hair, pulling him closer to his body. Every move was getting her closer to something still unknown to her body. As she was sure she couldn't take it anymore, torturous pleasure of his moves making it almost unbearable. If the world was about to end, she couldn't care less. Finally, she felt a sudden release and amazing bliss overflew her whole body, making her scream his name. he began to kiss her lightly, to somehow cool her emotions down. However the outcome was exactly the opposite, as it only whet her appetite.

Quickly, she began to take off his hakama, what surprised Byakuya quite much. Like some sort of devil possessed his little Rukia. Not that he would mind it. She was much braver than before. Her hands moving slowly on his body, discovering every part of it. Now it was her turn to learn him. Taking her time, she caressed his chest, making him groan. That time, she was in full control and she knew it. His whole body trembled under her soft touch, making him grow hard within seconds. Was she even aware what she was doing to him? How much she affected him? It didn't matter that time.

Another tender kiss entwined them together. Their bodies almost melting into one. Rukia knew what was about to happen and she surely knew she could expect some pain. But she was ready for it, she wanted to be his, making him her first. And only. She slowly opened her legs, letting him know that she was ready. He moaned with pleasure as soon as her body moved towards him.

"Are you sure?" he asked her, but his body was already out of control.

"I want you."

Nothing more could be said, they both craved for fulfillment. Slowly, he entered her, giving her pain mixed with pleasure. In the same moment her body wanted to stop and go on. Lust flowing in her veins rushed her to move while down part of her body screamed for a moment to overcome the pain. Byakuya as if reading her mind, stopped his movements for her to adjust that uncomfortable feeling, simultaneously kissing her neck to warm up her little body. As soon as the pain faded a bit, Rukia shyly pulled him closer, giving him sign to continue.

"I'll try to be gentle. Trust me." He murmured quietly in her ear.

He began to slowly move again, causing her pain. She knew she had to handle it and after few moment she knew it was worth it. His slow movements inside of her turned pain into inexplicable pleasure, something even better than she was feeling moments before. She moaned from delight and Byakuya heard his name for the second time. Feeling of shyness was replaced with lust and desire and as soon as the pain faded away completely, they both were ready to make their bodies turn into one. She wrapped her legs around him, making him get deeper and also groan from that sudden pleasure. They both began to move in their own private rhythm, crying from pleasure. In that special moment, their bodies became one, fulfilling their hopes and dreams, making them whole.

"Rukia…" he groaned loudly.

Hearing him cry her name in that specific tone, she was ready to explode within seconds. How could one man be so endlessly surprising? He held her tightly, moving faster and faster, causing her to gasp for air. She dug her nails into his back, scratching it to blood and arousing him even more. They both felt some kind of animalistic pleasure, but also very tender. He bit her neck to mark her as his and she let out another of her sweet moans. That was almost enough for them, it was so close, they both felt inextinguishable desire.

"I love you…" he murmured right to her ear, loud enough for her to hear.

"I love you too." She answered him, feeling his kisses on her neck again.

Another thrust, another moan, they were both getting closer. He finally crushed his lips onto hers and immediately felt her scream into his mouth as orgasm washed over her, causing her back to arch. One last thrust and he also found his release, moaning her name in such tone, that made her climax again, just from hearing it.

One moment, they became one, finally finding their ways to each other arms. The feeling of bliss and satisfaction was flowing into their bodies. They both felt complete, Rukia probably for the first time in her life. And Byakuya was alive again. That exquisite moment melted them both, made them one being. As they were gasping for the air, calming their bodies, he was observing her face. Her eyes were closed, but the most delightful smile appeared on her face. She was full of happiness, right beside him. And that moment, that emotion couldn't be faked. And now he was certain that whatever caused her to fall back, she loved him and all those problems, whatever they are, could easily be solved because they had each other.

He kissed her again and laid on his back, right beside her. Rukia hid her face in his chest, embracing him tightly. Byakuya was caressing her cheeks and suddenly he felt a single tear under his finger.

"Why are you crying?" he asked.

"Because in this moment I'm so happy, I don't want it to end." She cried into his chest.

"It doesn't have to end. I told you once. Tomorrow will change nothing."

"But it has to-" she tried to say something more, but he cut her words with soft kiss.

"Don't talk when all words ain't enough. You said it yourself, Rukia. We will talk tomorrow."

And he pulled her even closer. However she didn't want the night to end, she was feeling very tired. And also she didn't want to overstrain him much, as he was still very weak from his injuries. She felt sudden sleepiness and finally gave up to it.

After few minutes, he realized that she was already sleeping in his arms. He couldn't help but smile. Yesterday he was ready to give up and everything seemed hopeless and now, now he was the happiest man in Soul Society. Woman of his dreams, sleeping peacefully in his arms. Was there more to hope for? He knew they had to talk, but now it was obvious they both wanted the same. She told him clearly that she loved him. There was no greater proof. She was his and no matter what the morning might bring, he was ready to face it.

* * *

Byakuya was almost falling asleep, but suddenly he heard something. For an ordinary person it could be nothing, a wind maybe. But he knew better. Someone was eavesdropping, masking its reiatsu, trying to be invisible but underestimating Byakuya at the same time.

Byakuya quickly threw his night robe on and tried to catch the spy. But as soon as he opened his room's doors there was no one. However his eyes caught a quick movement and he shunpoed there fast. Just as he was near the west entrance, Byakuya heard two familiar voices.

"My lady, I think we have a problem." Voice of one of Byakuya's servants spoke.

"What is it now?" Yuna impatiently asked.

"It seems she spent the night with Byakuya-sama."

"Foolish little girl! How could she. I guess my little blackmail wasn't enough to keep her away from him."

So that's what it was all about. Suddenly it was obvious for Byakuya what happened. That old hag Yuna was blackmailing Rukia. _Wonder what she told her to keep Rukia away from me._ At first Byakuya wanted to show himself and unleash Senbonzakura on them, but after few seconds he decided it would be wise to listen to the whole conversation.

"So what shall we do now, My Lady?"

"Tomorrow I will have to pay another visit here and talk to that stupid little brat. I have to get rid of her, otherwise my little girl will never marry Byakuya."

"And what should I do?"

"You, you must keep her away from him tomorrow. I'll talk to her and let us hope she will stay away from him."

Byakuya knew enough. And he also knew what he was about to do with those two. But he decided to wait until the morning. First, he wanted to talk to Rukia. And this time, it had to be one hell of a conversation. He came back to his room, and slipped back onto the bed, trying to not wake Rukia up. She murmured something under her nose and finally embraced him tightly. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead.

_It all will be alright tomorrow._

_Now I know._

_And I will never let you go._

* * *

**Did it make you hot? I know I was sweating the whole time, anyway xD Did you like it? I bet you do ^^ So anyway, from now on, I'll definitely try to update faster. **

**I also wanted to thank every one of you who reviewed or PMed me. It is very inspiring for me to know that you actually like my fic. So for all of you who paid attention to my story, I send big fat hug! And I hope I didn't disappoint you with this chapter.**

**xoxo ;)**


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